Into the Spiral - Alex - Wattpad

Story cover for Into the Spiral by Lilog224ever

Into the Spiral

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Reads 14
Votes 0
Parts 1
Time <5 mins

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anxiety attacks blackout chaos coping emotional emotions fear haitian health intense jamaican loud mental panic personal ptsd raw recovery self-awareness spiraling spirituality story survival trauma

I wake up, but my body moves before my mind can catch up.
My soul lingers, still laying down, while I stand.
The world is foggy. Wavy. Disorienting.

Weed, meant to calm me, only amplifies the chaos.
My heart races. My thoughts spin.
Panic rises, creeping into every corner of me.

Shaking is my first warning.
Once it starts, I am on a path I cannot control.
Language shifts. My Jamaican and Haitian sides emerge.
Patois spills out with urgency, a red flag for anyone watching.

The panic is loud. Overwhelming.
It has been with me since my 20s, and now, in my 30s, it strikes randomly.
Blackouts happen mid-fight, mid-thought, mid-breath.
I move faster than my own mind, yelling, swinging, shaking.
Friends grab me. Hugs, words, even the smallest gestures slowly pull me back.

This is more than anxiety.
More than stress.
It's panic attacks, blackouts, trauma, and the consequences of substances
mixing with a fragile system.

Every heartbeat is a warning. Every breath is a battle.
I've survived chaos, fights, fear, and moments where I barely recognize myself.
This is my reality.
This is my story.

💔 Trigger warning: panic attacks, blackouts, substance use, traumaAll Rights Reserved

anxiety attacks blackout chaos coping emotional emotions fear haitian health intense jamaican loud mental panic personal ptsd raw recovery self-awareness spiraling spirituality story survival trauma

Table of contents

Into the Spiral
Sat, Oct 4, 2025

1 part

Into the Spiral
Sat, Oct 4, 2025

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