Thesaurus Of Euphemisms

(WARNING: READ AT YOUR OWN RISK-RISK OF WHAT, I FORGOT THE WORD, BUT JUST TRUST ME.)
Welcome to Thesaurus of Euphemisms,
the only book brave enough-no, stupid enough-to dive head-first into the forbidden depths of metaphor hell.
Inside these pages, you will discover:
🔥 Over 60 AUs
that absolutely no sane editor would approve.
😩 A cursed vocabulary list
that will make your English teacher cry blood.
👹 Romantic tension that could power a small city,
despite being 100% PG and 300% emotionally unhinged.
💀 Smut euphemisms that should've stayed buried,
including, but not limited to, "forbidden yogurt,"
"trouser serpent," and "enchanted croissant."
(Why were these written? Because you asked for chaos.)
💫 A multiverse where Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jungkook
fall in love across dimensions-
from Walmart to Viking battles to cyberpunk neon skylines-
all with the exact same tragic level of stupidity.
This is not just a book.
This is an academic disaster,
a romantic parody bible,
a literary war crime,
and possibly a summoning ritual for something unholy.
Side effects may include:
- uncontrollable laughter
- emotional combustion
- second-hand embarrassment
- milk exiting your nose
- the sudden urge to Bluetooth-connect with a stranger
Proceed with caution.
Proceed with vibes.
Proceed with... whatever the word was.
Thesaurus of Euphemisms
Because somebody had to write this.
(*Un*fortunately, it was me.)