losing elle

losing elle

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WpMetadataReadOngoing<5 mins
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Sun, Jul 19, 2015
I stared at the screen intently as my best friend shed tears I or anyone never knew were hidden in the dark. "It was like the world was moving on without me," she paused choking on a sob and heaving a deep breath. "And I couldn't do anything to catch up with it, I felt so left behind," The girl in my screen was unfamiliar as she bowed her head down in hopelessness, as if the mere idea of living tired her out. "And I tried to run, to catch up, believe me. But it was impossible. It was like continuously walking in a tunnel, not knowing if you were heading towards the light or to oblivion," she paused, sighing. "And for the first time in years, I'm saying that I'm afraid, terrified even. That the darkness will suck me in," suddenly, she looked up and it was like she was staring right at me. "And no one will be able to save me." she whispered and the screen went black. And it dawned on me that all of this was real, I was really losing Elle. And the mere thought of losing her was horrifying.
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losing
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Being in love with your best friend isn't the ideal life situation but for Zora, it's her only life situation. Secretly harboring her feelings for her best friend, Sierra, Zora pours her emotions into her journal in the form of poetry. After years of keeping her attraction for her friend at bay and trying to deny her feelings by forcing herself to love a boy who unconditionally loves her, Zora's favorite emotional outlet becomes the cause of her life falling apart as the truth finally comes out. ***** It was happening again. It was dark, sunset, I waited for her to be done with volleyball practice 'because she was my ride'. Somehow we wandered from the gym to the football field and we were sitting at the very top of the bleachers staring at each other. Her dark hair mirrored the direction of the wind, the setting sun being replaced by the brightness of her smile. We were sitting so close I could feel her warmth. It was an unusual situation. Friends don't do this. We held eye contact for a long time before I couldn't take it anymore and just closed my eyes. It wasn't real, she was just my friend. Then, I felt her tuck a strand of my curly hair behind my ear. That with the chill of the night sent shivers down my spine and a swarm of butterflies attacked my stomach. I reopened my eyes. If she didn't want me, why did she look at me that way? I held her hand and I held it for so long because I didn't know if we'd have another moment like this. We talk and laugh and she tells me I'm pretty and I ask her if she'd just noticed that and we laugh again. I realize the feelings I felt in that moment were not just the intense feelings of attraction that I felt every time I was with her. Warmth flooded to my face and if it wasn't for my dark complexion, my blush would be noticeable. I look into her dark-colored eyes and I come to the conclusion that I'm royally fucked and I'm probably also in love.

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