Emerald Eyes and Emotional Damage

Draco Malfoy has a problem.

Unfortunately, the problem is Harry Potter.

It starts with Potter standing far too close during Potions, close enough for Draco to notice the ridiculous green of his eyes and wonder - briefly, horrifically - if his hair is actually soft. Two weeks later, Draco finds himself dramatically confessing these thoughts to his father like a lovesick poet while Lucius Malfoy silently rethinks every life choice that led him to this moment.

Now Draco is accidentally staring at Potter across the Great Hall, walking into pillars, hoarding insults like love letters, and spiralling so publicly that even the Slytherins are embarrassed for him. Meanwhile, Harry Potter is starting to suspect his long-time rival might not actually want to hex him at all.

A disastrous, chaotic comedy about unwanted feelings, secondhand embarrassment, and Lucius Malfoy suffering immensely while his son falls catastrophically in love.