Trying Not to Break

Seventeen-year-old Jae "Jay" Carter is exhausted.

By day, she's a stud just trying to survive senior year, avoid getting suspended, keep her grades from crashing, and pretend everything is okay. By night, she's clocking in at Amazon, stacking boxes until her feet ache because bills don't care if she's tired.

At home, things are no easier. Her parents don't understand why she can't just "be happy." Her friends only see the version of her she lets them see. Her family loves her, but love doesn't always fix what's broken.

Behind her tough exterior, Jay battles Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, depression, anxiety, trauma, and the constant feeling that she's one bad day away from falling apart. Some days she's the life of the party. Other days she can't get out of bed.

As relationships crumble, secrets pile up, and adulthood comes rushing toward her, Jay has to decide if surviving is enough-or if she's finally ready to start living.

A raw, emotional coming-of-age story about identity, family, friendship, love, mental health, and finding a reason to keep going when life won't stop hitting.