Your Mortality

Ever wondered what My Immortal (the infamously bad 2006 Harry Potter fanfiction by 'Tara Gilesbie') would be like if it had decent grammar, spelling, syntax, and a plotline that actually went somewhere coherent?

Strap in and buckle your seatbelts for this stupid rewrite of the infamous fanfiction featuring my very own version of Ebony, Satan-and-Stanism, and too many unhinged plot twists.

(This is literally just my immortal but cleaned up to make you not want to gouge your eyes out while reading it. Until chapter 15, where it diverges because the original has basically no plot at all between chapters 15 and 24 and I didn't want to subject you to that. Crossposted from ao3 where I am the original writer.)
This story is complete and can also be read on ao3 under the same title and the username 'grizzlyeagleshark', but I didn't feel like copy and pasting all of it, so it's going to be updated here until all the chapters are posted.