A Truly Inspirational Story

"A truely philosophical tale about an incredible national figure." -Time Magazine
"One of a kind, Glarse has outdone himself once again." -New York Times
"It's good to see that Glarse has taken time off of his idiotic humor books to deliver us a more serious peace of American culture." -Wallstreet Journal
"An incredible statement, I'm about to tweet @barak.obama69 and tell him he needs to run his country like the protagonist of this story." -Michele Obama
"suck a phat chode u dumass lmao" -Glarse's friend from Yale