At Least Pizza Will Never Hurt Me

*loosely based on the fantastic rom-com Hitch because why not, I will not be using the plot, just the concept*

Dating. "What is the purpose of dating?" one may ask. While many these days go on dates just to "get some", there are some people who still like to believe that dating is the means to finding your life-long soulmate. Everyone deserves to find their one true soulmate, but most need help getting there. That's where Penelope Platt comes in. She's smooth, classy, and knows how to win the hearts of both men and women. She can help you get to date number three in the blink of an eye. What happens when she meets four of the biggest challenges of her career? A recluse trying to capture the attention of a rockstar, a self-absorbed former child star attempting to humble himself for the take-no-nonsense girl at the gym, a former white trash girl pawning after her high society boss, and herself trying to win the heart of a boy who'd rather date pizza than any single woman on the planet.