"She pictured herself in a better place than she was already experiencing, yet found herself back at home. 'Futile!', she cried. Then cried hysterically, uncontrollably, tiresome, and dreadfully. Only Thomas could comfort her."
Elaine is traumatised by a weakness. She denies herself the opportunity of happiness. Afterwards love rescues her, and she learns it is not such a bad thing to be who she is.