Dear Tessa, today I got humped by a ten year old. |One Direction
  • Reads 10,320
  • Votes 146
  • Parts 15
  • Time 3h 27m
  • Reads 10,320
  • Votes 146
  • Parts 15
  • Time 3h 27m
Ongoing, First published Mar 01, 2013
Tessa Collins is gifted, as people call her. Unfortunately not in a magical way, no: Tessa is intelectually gifted. Her IQ of 180 makes her one of England's biggest geniuses. This all comes with a price though, Tessa is asocially awkward, insecure 18 year old girl. After finishing her two studies, psychology and journalism she finds herself bored to death. There's no sad story to tell, she has two loving parents, maybe a bit too loving, and a younger sister. 

Her life turns upside down when a creepy sounding man calls her. Creepy you say? Yes that must be Simon Cowell. She gets the oppertunity of a lifetime when mister Cowell wants her to help a popular band with some personal issues. She has to go on tour with them and help them handle the media and be their personal diary, their problems are her problems to solve. Tessa looking for an adventure and hoping to see the world says yes, for such a smart girl she can be pretty naïve. What she doesn't know is that there are boys involved, 5 of them actually. Boys? Even the thought of them makes her stomach turn and her palms sweaty. 

Niall’s swearing like a sailor in public and interviews, Zayn keeps cheating and Louis has some anger issues, but the biggest surprise may come from Harry, well known heartthrob. The boys won’t be easy to crack, they’re looking for some fun and seem to take every opportunity they get to make Tessa uncomfortable and irritated. Follow Tessa and the cheeky boys behind the scenes of all the touring and interviews. Sometimes all you can do is take a chill-pill and enjoy the rollecoaster that is life.
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Bᴏᴏᴋ Oɴᴇ Iɴ Tʜᴇ Tᴏ Bᴇ Fᴀᴍᴏᴜs Sᴇʀɪᴇs(: A stuck up, rich girl named Maya-Ryan gets kicked out of her house and told she has an interview her father set up. Her father claims she won’t last a day, rather alone get the job. The only thing he is paying for is her flat. But when she has an interview, Simon Cowell is taken aback with the outgoing, young girl. He promises to hire her if One Direction likes her. Ryan knows that this is her shot to prove her father wrong. Right away, two of One Direction’s members hate her. They happen to be probably the nicest of the five, Liam Payne and Niall Horan. Liam Payne thinks she has something up her sleeve. Niall just doesn’t like her. In a plan to piss her father off and prove she can do things on her own, she earns Liam and Niall’s trust. Also, she dives head first into a relationship. But when One Direction finds out her little plan, what will happen? Aʟʟ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ᴀʀᴇ ᴄᴏᴘʏʀɪɢʜᴛᴇᴅ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀ ᴛʜᴇ Cᴏᴘʏʀɪɢʜᴛ, Dᴇsɪɢɴs ᴀɴᴅ Pᴀᴛᴇɴᴛs Aᴄᴛ 1988. Tʜɪs ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇs ᴀʟʟ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀs, ᴘʀᴏʟᴏɢᴜᴇs/ᴇᴘɪʟᴏɢᴜᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴀssᴏᴄɪᴀᴛᴇᴅ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ. Aɴʏ ᴜɴᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀɪᴢᴇᴅ ᴄᴏᴘʏɪɴɢ, ʙʀᴏᴀᴅᴄᴀsᴛɪɴɢ, ᴍᴀɴɪᴘᴜʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴ, ᴅɪsᴛʀɪʙᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏʀ sᴇʟʟɪɴɢ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪs ᴡᴏʀᴋ ᴄᴏɴsᴛɪᴛᴜᴛᴇs ᴀs ᴀɴ ɪɴғʀɪɴɢᴇᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴏғ ᴄᴏᴘʏʀɪɢʜᴛ. Aɴʏ ɪɴғʀɪɴɢᴇᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪs ᴄᴏᴘʏʀɪɢʜᴛ ɪs ᴘᴜɴɪsʜᴀʙʟᴇ ʙʏ ʟᴀᴡ.