to go up in smoke

to go up in smoke

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Tue, Nov 26, 2019
Back in Rhode Island, it was typical for twenty year old Natalie Rinaldi to go to the nearest medical marijuana dispensary to pick up her prescription for her depression. Violet was an avid pot smoker, even before her doctor had given her the prescription. Now that Natalie has moved out to the West Coast to attend the University of California in Los Angeles starting this fall semester, she spends her last months of freedom smoking up her new apartment and trying to find some stoner friends. When she goes to her new local dispensary to pick up, she meets someone who heavily captures her attention. The two become close, and teach each other the true meaning of love and heartbreak, and what it is like to battle with depression and addiction. They show each other what is truly means for everything to go up in smoke.
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Friendless and timid, Guinevere is stuck in her socially anxious shadow, content to let her sister lead and live a sheltered life. Without Natalie pushing her to break out of her comfort zone, she'd be trapped in fear. The world is scary, even her own family conflicts terrify her; she needs Natalie's support. But what happens when Natalie, her big sister, her mentor and only real friend, suddenly can't be there for every moment of her life? Lola, raised to be a hardworking farmer, when all she wants is a bit of agency over her life, the freedom to do what she wants. And yet, she is perfectly willing to let Natalie handle conversations for her. For as much as she wants to be free, she wouldn't know what to do with herself, get meticulously caught up in planning the details and never end up doing anything. And Natalie, who has no personal desires, simply living in moments and finding the best in whatever is going on. Freely engaging with her friends and helping them, as she lacks her own internal drive, the self awareness to know what she wants. After a long childhood struggle with her self esteem and valuing herself, that has become what she "needs," her coping strategy with rough situations. Being complacent with what happens to her and simply accepting, with no real goals of her own, no idea that her friends are just as directionless as she is. When health complications arise for her, and her friend group is falling apart around her as she can't guide them, she'll have to ask the essential questions that she can't simply answer in a quick sentence. The questions that she has long dismissed as unimportant. Is this what she truly wants, to be solely fulfilled by everyone else depending on her for support? And where does she draw the line? This story touches on potentially triggering content, including the use of slurs, toxic family relationships, anxiety, anger, and death. Any real people, brands or places are only used to further realize the environment.

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