These Are My Confessions

These Are My Confessions

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WpMetadataReadДля взрослыхЗавершенная история срд, июн. 1, 20161h 41m
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Fiction
Romance
These are my confessions to everything that I've done. When you read this I don't want you to look at me differently. I don't want your pity or any type of sympathy. See I knew what I signed up for when I entered the game. I choose this lifestyle and at one time I thought it was the best choice for me. I had access to any and everything. Don't be fooled though there is always a dark side. Nobody ever tells you about the price you have to pay when you are in my position. Everybody sees the good but, not the bad. The days you have to spend trying to cover your face with makeup. The different people you meet every night just to survive. The things you would go through just to get someone's attention. I guess you could say I did it for love. Only if you believe in that type of stuff. I would like to call my experience a high. It was pure ecstasy at first. The charming smile, expensive clothes, fancy dinners, nice vacations. Then it turns into a living hell you can't escape from. That's when people start showing their true colors. When lights go off there is a whole different side to a person. You could literally be sleeping next to the devil himself. 'Let's do this dirty laundry'
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My hands were stretched out to him. Expressing what my voice couldn't. I needed his help - even if it's just this once - I'd hoped he helped me. But he didn't reach out to me. Instead, I watch him turn his back at me. I watch him walk away when I needed him the most. Even after all she said, there was a part of me that hoped it wasn't true. Even if he doesn't love me - I'd thought he would at the very least liked me... maybe? I thought all the things I did for him would make him see me, tolerate me or something. But no. We kept drifting further apart. And it's all my fault. I simply did too much. I trusted the wrong person. Did the craziest things for love. Forgot my self worth. All these to earn his approval, his acknowledgment - for him to see me - none of which ever happened. And now, here I am. Lying in the pool of my own blood for someone who doesn't even care for my life or death. Oh, how I wish I could turn back time! I refuse to face my family like this. This is too shameful. For I've fallen too far from the woman I was raised to be. I dare not face my mama. Now, for the first time ever, I wish not to be seen, heard or even thought of- I wish not to be saved. I wish my soul disintegrates and scatters into nothingness . I wish to be completely erased from the universe. This story isn't edited yet. I apologize for some mistakes you might see. Your comments and advices are appreciated as this is my first book so it might be quite... Thank you

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