The Facility
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PTSD is a serious thing. A lot of people suffer from it. I don't know how I've survived this long with this thing. This thing that haunts my dreams when I sleep, and when I'm awake.
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My Story
*WARNING TALKS ABOUT SUICIDE AND OTHER TRIGGERING THINGS, DO NOT READ IF YOU'RE EASILY TRIGGERED OR EMOTIONAL* This story includes me talking a little about my Trauma, and some of the things I've gone through since I was a kid. There will be some detailed parts here and there, and these are dark stories.Kumpleto
My Diary
This is my real life and real situations. I hope you all enjoy.
The Redemption of Maximus
The world is screwed up place. Everyone in it just wants peace when it isn't promised to nobody. We work for ourselves to try to improve our ways of life only for someone who has more to take it. Everything is about monetary gain and if you don't got the green you better have a way to survive. Help wont come when you need it. There is no home and having shame is a simple thing of the past. We all tell people to have hope. We tell them that if they work hard enough that change will eventually come and with that change they will find their happy ending. I've watched humans kill for that happy ending. I've committed murder when a tyrant thought to torture the only good thing in this world I have ever found in this fucked up place. Even when I tried to save it, I still lost it. Yeah, you heard right. I am no saint. This world is far from cupcake and t ,rainbows and their isn't not one soul that could tell me different. I have had to fight to survive since the day I lii I broke out of an egg into this world. No one has ever known where I came from and from the moment I got here I've never know any kindness. I have always been the odd one out because I was different. I'm not talking different just because the color of my skin. I'm talking different because when I get well and truly pissed I turn into a vicious monster. I'm not talking a kiddie monster like the one that creeps under your bed while you are sleeping or chooses to hide in your closet. I'm the type that you cant get away from. I travel through space and time. If I want you, I will have you. I have the powers of invisibility on my side, and you will never see me coming. There is no one that can catch me because I can poof away at the drop of a hat. If that doesn't scare you than the thousands of scars on my body and my size definitely will. But who cares about that shit anyway. Looks aren't everything. I am Maximus.Kumpleto
Maze of memories
People always say every life should be cherished. That every single one of them is equally fragile and precious. Like a beautiful glass sculpture or the blossoming flowers in spring. But the thing is, everyone's definition of beautiful is different. Some people prefer roses over orchids. Some of them like sculptures of people whereas others like sculptures of animals. And so there are times when even the most beautiful sculpture gets thrown away like trash or forgotten somewhere because they found one that's prettier. The beautiful flowers that bloomed in spring will wither away and eventually become nothing but dust. There are times when a sculpture in itself could be really beautiful but a tiny flaw will make people deem it as a "mistake". The flowers that are left to wither away just because they miss a leave, or because they aren't the right size or the right colour. So you see that saying about every life being equally precious?, yeah that only counts for the "perfect" ones. Still some of these faulty sculptures and broken flowers managed to make it into the world. They would be facing the harsh reality of this world and would have to fight to survive. Some of them would unfortunately lose this fight in the end, leaving to a faraway place in hopes to find peace and quiet. Still just being able to make it this far in this harsh world is something to be proud of, as friends and family will forever remember these brave individuals who fought hard to survive until the very end.Kumpleto
Someone New ✓
"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboardKumpleto
A Demon's Rage
I've lived for many lifetimes. I've seen things no man has, lived through harsh experiences none should survive. How did I survive? Because I'm no ordinary man. But every single moment of my damnation has not prepared me for this.Kumpleto
Starving For Help
"I smile everyday. I live my life like nothing is wrong with me. No one would ever guess that I'm screaming inside or that I've secretly been hiding this huge part of my life. No one would ever know that I cry myself to sleep at night or that deep down I'm starving for help." Welcome to Anorexia. Your hostess is Ana. She'll take over from here. Suffering alone inside of your mind from a terrifying mental disorder, is something that even those who battle such a thing every day, cannot fully understand. It's like being alone 24/7 yet it's never quiet inside of your head. You can't stop the voices. You can't control your emotions. As it gets worse, you lose control of your body all together. You become prey to your disease and You can't fight back. That is what it's like for someone who has spent years of their life suffering in silence from an eating disorder. Fighting a monster that you have no chance of beating. It's almost impossible to describe the type of torture that consumes your mind. Hell. It's equivalent to pure hell.Kumpleto
Restarting
There is a war raging within me, a constant battle between what I know and what I feel. My priorities became a blur after you happened, and absence never felt so real.Kumpleto
*WARNING TALKS ABOUT SUICIDE AND OTHER TRIGGERING THINGS, DO NOT READ IF YOU'RE EASILY TRIGGERED OR EMOTIONAL* This story includes me talking a little about my Trauma, and some of the things I've gone through since I was a kid. There will be some detailed parts here and there, and these are dark stories.
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