Inside the Depressed Mind
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I wrote this last November when the negativity of suicide and self harm were still rampant in my life. Since then, I've become a happier person and only have smaller waves of depression. I want to share this, because sometimes it's hard to understand someone who is depressed. I want to put this out there to help those who love someone with depression to understand what it might be like to struggle with it. I also want people with severe depression to know they are not alone. I want people who suffer every day to know that there is an end to the suffering, and it isn't death. This was a fantasy of mine last May, and writing it was a way to cope with my feelings. The names have been changed to protect my friends and me. Please do not send negativity, as this is not easy to share, even almost a year later. Share this with whomever might benefit from reading it; I know several of my supporters wished they could understand.
If you are struggling with suicidal thoughts, please seek help or call 1 (800) 273-8255.
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I stood on the edge of the rooftop. My eyes closed and my mind free. I'm ready. Now is the time. I could feel my breath quickening, Breathe in, Breathe out. I slowly start to gain composure of my thoughts. I can hear the people on the ground. I can see them entering the building in their perfect dresses with their perfect hair. I look down at my Royal Blue gown and smile. It's time. I slowly exhale and let myself fall. I'm free. Well, that's what I thought when I jumped, but the world hates me. So now. I'm alive and kicking, quite literally kicking in fact. Paisley George is a screw up, her "True Love" even knew it. So she jumped, but her.... attempted suicide was a failure, now she is stuck living with her grandma. event after event, Paisley ends up becoming friends with the towns bad boys and maybe she might just fall in love with one. You never know.
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