So many words (Phan)

I run my fingers through my hair and look up at the ceiling trying to hold the tears back but they are already rolling down my cheeks. I can’t deal with this anymore. I can’t ignore them, my feelings.
The flat is dead quiet except my shaky breathing and the rain pouring against the window like it’s mad too.
Blue eyes, pale skin, black hair and a beautiful laughter.
I can still feel warmth where his fingers gently squeezed my shoulder when he said goodnight four hours ago.