After 13th
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- Parts 4
Ongoing6m
Last published Sun, Oct 4, 2015
I have passed 23 years of unmerciful set of Friday the 13ths. A host of hapless situations, a never ending stressful journey and a life full of embarassment and shame. I lived this way for 276 months already. I really do hope to atleast luckily win a game on the internet but luck was never within me. I expected a lot of changes in every birthday I face. Oh, well no changes after all! I got into many failures but never had I experienced a little joy for a least victory. "Luckily" I was born. Atleast I did not die when my mother gave birth to me in a car accident. Likewise as my birthplace, I'm actually an accident too. Will any tiny drop of fortune be mine? Eventually I wish, everything will change, I hope! After the 13th.
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"How can Cupid... how could you be so cruel?" I curse lowly. Who could have imagined something like this happening to me? It had been so long since everything happened, but somehow the pain in my heart never left. The memories starts to flashback into my mind as I start to process what is happening in front of me, and why my past heartbreaks are all gathered at the same place. Nightmare, my childhood friend and first love. My first ever heartbreak. I tend to find him in everyone I have loved. He was cold and unpredictable but he was also warm and considerate at times... He was complicated but I loved all of him. Error, the one I chased over and one I was not willing to give up. He stood up from the rest and gave color to my world. All my poems were dedicated to him and him alone. Dust, possibly my other half. He felt like my soulmate. Everything about him made me feel like we were meant for each other. We shared the same interests about everything but I was wrong about one thing. We didn't share the same feelings. His heart belonged to my best friend. Killer, a flirty guy who people often rumored as the playboy. Most girls had fallen in love with his charm and personality. I was one of those unfortunate ones who fell right into his trap. But I... I saw something in him that other people couldn't see; there was something beneath those sweet grins. Horror. My comfort. My home. The one who filled the gap. The one who I think of every little nice thing. I love him so much to the point where I feel like the pain that would come with it would be worse than death. It had to be avoided. Cross. I was always drawn into him. He was my best-est friend. The one who I can count on everytime. The shoulder I can lean to when needed. The one who made me feel like I am the best thing that ever happened in his life. He was perfect while I am just... me. So why did I have to see them again? Why now? Love is not something I want to go through again... never again. <\3
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