Picturesque Existence; Road to Recovery
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You live, you suffer, you die. Then what?Nothing.
Darkness enveloping you like a warm cushion, beckoning you to stay, is how people suffering from clinical depression feel. But there must be a way out, or at least a way to ease the pain.
In this book, I'll tell you how I dealt with depression and give you sensible advice on the topic. I'll talk about what things can trigger depression and how I dealt with them as well.
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Save Me
I was drowning. I knew that. I also knew that the hands around my throat, pushing me deeper into the river water was the cause. What I didn't know was who was drowning me and why. It hurt thinking. It hurt to do anything right now. But I still screamed under the cold water and pushed the hands away as hard as I could. It didn't have much effect. I fought and fought, but I was getting weaker, and colder. The pain was overbearing. I couldn't breathe. It was the worst pain imaginable; and as the hands that were around my neck were forcibly ripped off by some unknown force, I slipped deeper into the depths of the river. My hair was straight above me along with my arms. My eyes were open and the water burned. A darkness started to pull me under, taking the pain away. I felt a small pressure around my waist, before the darkness completely consumed me. The last thing I remember is thinking, save me.Lengkap
¿How far are you willing to go? {Book 4} (Old Version) Being renewed
A body swam above me as he moved toward me, oh for heaven sakes! Even stuck in a bottom of the pool I had the disgrace to be saved by him again? What was he even doing here in the first place? Was he stalking me or something? Oh God, I had a stalker like in the movies. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me up but my body didn't move an inch. I pushed him away from me and shook his shoulders as I pointed down at my stuck foot. He swam down and tried to unhook the bracelet but he couldn't. He pushed himself up and I thought that he had given up on me. I thought he was a rapist, now that I blew his cover it was a perfect way to get rid of me. I'm going to save myself, I don't need him anyways. I hovered and struggled to get it out. How did this even happen? I was pushed as jerk face returned, my head leaned back as he swam toward me and sneaked his arms around my waist to bring me forward. He plastered our mouths together to give me mouth to mouth breathing and the bracelet suddenly unhooked by itself. The fuck the ancestors think they're doing?Lengkap
The Journey to Escaping Darkness (Book 1)
You can't ever completely erase pain. Somehow it'll leave behind a memory. And sometimes you need more than just yourself to escape the darkness that's added up for over a thousand years.Lengkap
Broken Into Darkness
Darkness, how do you describe it? It is a feeling where you are so far gone, a numb feeling that turns into nothing. All the light you once had is now filled with blackness. You are trying to reach the surface but you can not seem to get up there. You're just sinking down. When you are stuck between the light and the darkness. When death comes for the person you love the most, it takes your breath away, leaving you gasping for air. You realize that the person you loved the most was the light, who kept the darkness at bay, never letting it come back to the surface. Once that is taken away from you, you feel as if the light will never return. You feel like there is no purpose to your life anymore. Without the light there is not a purpose to live life. Looking at everyone, everything you start to realize that there is no point so why live? When the person you loved is ripped away from you, no explanation why. Why her? Why take away my light? So you just allow the darkness to consume you, where you are done with it all and shut off any emotions to feel nothing.Lengkap
In Shadows of Night
I woke to a sudden breeze invading the warmth from the heavy blanket that caressed my skin. Here, alone with my thoughts, the still, calm quiet in the atmosphere is almost painful. I feel suffocated in the clingy, static air. In quiet, still moments like these, I can almost feel Him. I don't know who "Him" is, but I can feel his presence. It's almost calming, especially on fearful, anxiety fueled nights. Usually, he was the strongest when I had a nightmare. The nightmares weren't as common now, but, right after everything happened, I was having them every night. I'd wake up and swear I was drenched in blood, my eyes and lips sticky, my nose filled with the smell of iron and fuel. After everything, that's when Him first came. From there, he just never left. I can usually sense when Him is near. Today, though, his presence is stronger. I can almost feel Him next to me, weighing down the mattress. Some nights, I roll over and imagine how he looks, envision his smile or the sparkle in his eyes. He's never there and I'm left clutching to the thought that he exists, staring into empty air. Tonight, though, I swear I can reach out and touch him. Extending my hand gently, I sweep my hand out into the darkness and meet an inexplicable warmth. A scream rips from my lungs as hands cover my face and two icy blue eyes stare back at me, daring me to speak again. A soft cloth caressed my nose and mouth before I felt myself fade into bed. All Rights Reserved. Contains graphic descriptions of violence and assault. Contains battle scene.Lengkap
When our eyes met
"As I looked up, my eyes met someone else's. He had curly copper brown hair that fell on his forehead and a chiseled jaw but I wasn't too concerned about his physical attributes. What really stuck out to me was his hazel eyes. I felt my pupils dilate as I slowly melted in his eyes. I felt safe in the comfort of his gaze. Why do I feel safe? The room faded away. It was just the two of us. Why does he have this effect on me? His eyes looked sympathetic. Why is he sympathetic? What are my eyes telling him? I felt a warm sensation flow through my body as my breaths became deeper. I didn't care about any of what happened before and I didn't care about anyone else. I just wanted to stay in this moment, with him, forever."Lengkap
Drowning
I couldn't answer him, and I could tell that he knew what he was doing. Emmett already had me so far under, making me believe that I had control over what has occurred these past few months. He had his hold on me, and he was only letting us sink into deeper waters. "I think you know how I feel, Grace." He told me, forcing his eyes on mine, making it impossible for me to respond. "I love you." His light, clear blue eyes were all I could see, reminding me of the lake, the sky, and of him, all at the same time. And as I looked into those blue irises, and whispered back my response as he brought his mouth closer to mine, I found that for the first time, I was alright with drowning, as long as it was Emmett pulling me under.Lengkap
the kingdom of sorrow
you will get what is coming to you. but I will instead write about it instead of attracting any of you.
I was drowning. I knew that. I also knew that the hands around my throat, pushing me deeper into the river water was the cause. What I didn't know was who was drowning me and why. It hurt thinking. It hurt to do anything right now. But I still screamed under the cold water and pushed the hands away as hard as I could. It didn't have much effect. I fought and fought, but I was getting weaker, and colder. The pain was overbearing. I couldn't breathe. It was the worst pain imaginable; and as the hands that were around my neck were forcibly ripped off by some unknown force, I slipped deeper into the depths of the river. My hair was straight above me along with my arms. My eyes were open and the water burned. A darkness started to pull me under, taking the pain away. I felt a small pressure around my waist, before the darkness completely consumed me. The last thing I remember is thinking, save me.
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