Story cover for Holy Saint by humourgirls
Holy Saint
humourgirls
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humourgirls
Ongoing, Unang na-publish Nov 21, 2015
Not all saints can be called great. The finest example of this line is our favourite Holy Saint. One of the stupidest characters you would have ever come across, this guy has a stomach capacity of 50 litres, and lives in a lemonade fountain. He choreographed a dance with Mrs Stupid, and made six girls take part in it, who, unfortunately, just before the dance were bitten by mosquitoes, so Holy Saint had to dance. He's an amazing dancer, mind you- famous personalities have been inspired by him. A collection of the funniest stories you would have ever come across, this collection is a must-read for all humour-lovers :D
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Table of contents

1 parte

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☼Shine☼ [boyxboy] [oneshot] ni blondewitAbrain
1 parte Kumpleto Mature
They all think he’s a vampire. He thinks they’re all idiots. Also, Edward Cullen can kiss his skinny, pale ass.
VICENZO ni TheWalnutTree
74 mga parte Kumpleto Mature
Raised in the Mafia, I have known no other life other than cold calculated violence and discipline. A life where brutality is praised and weakness is ridiculed, I became the best of my parents and the worst the world has ever seen. Young and still gaining control of my mafia, love is never an option for me, that is until one night at a Mafia ball where I spy a woman who has me to my knees. I want more, more, more. She's reckless and cunningly beautiful. Too good for me and yet the only one for me. We fight for survival and for each other because neither one of us will let go. ------------------------- I sat in the back, legs apart and looked at her with my head tilted. She licked her lips and squeezed though the front seats all the while looking at me. I pulled her towards me and she chuckled as she sat on my lap. Her legs were either side of me and her breathing was ragged. I ran my hand down her cheek and pulled her into me. I kissed her lips and soon our tongues whirled around. Hungry and rough. She held her head back and I began to plant rough kisses onto her beautiful neck. "Am I a bad influence?" She breathed. Her hands were on the back of my neck. I stopped kissing her and looked up at her. "Everyone needs a little bad in their lives." I whispered back making her smile. My hands found her waist and I noticed her short dress had ridden up exposing her thighs. She wore it to tease me and I loved it. Fuck, I loved her body. She breathed into my neck and I pulled off her dress in one slick motion. My hands were all over her back, feeling her, touching her. Her soft skin drove me crazy. ------------------------- BE AWARE: Trigger warnings: MATURE CONTENT 18+ (SMUT) SWEARING VIOLENCE/GUN VIOLENCE SELF HARM/SUICIDE (REFERENCES) EXPLICIT LANGUAGE REFERENCES TO RAPE SMOKING/ALCOHOL/DRUGS BLOOD/DEATH/GORE ©️ All rights reserved ™️ The Walnut Tree BOOK TWO OF THE MAFIA SERIES
His Greatest Sanctity ni lote003
62 parte Kumpleto Mature
"Breathe." He dipped his head down so that his lips were right at my ear, his strong arm wrapped securely around my waist, molding my body into his. "If you're going to fall apart,." He starts, teeth gritted. "Now's the time. I'll be here to put you back together when it's over." I squeezed my eyes shut again, and I did just that. I fell apart. ******* Secrets. Lies. Deception. Murder. I'd seen and done it all. And not willingly. So I left. I sacrificed my freedom to save myself, and the only way to ensure my own safety was to start over. Clean slate. New people. New me. But the last thing I expected when I arrived at Manonwell Prep Academy was to be bombarded by a boy-no, a man who held some unknown vendetta against me. Call it obsession, infatuation, hatred. To me it was all one in the same. He was everywhere I turned, like a shadow. Watching me. Taunting me. Haunting me. And it was all because of something I did to him a long time ago. It was something so bad that he couldn't stand me, that he wanted me dead, and the idea of making my life a living hell was something that he took pride in. But I didn't remember. I had no clue what I could've done to him in the past, but he was hellbent on pushing me until I did. My plans on starting over were shattered the minute I stepped inside that school. He was the type of person that demanded your attention without having to speak. He was untamed and wild and unhinged. But what he didn't know was that the Winter Travers that he knew in past, the one I didn't remember, was no longer alive. I was different. She was gone and I was here. And he was everything I should've been afraid of. Sinister, quiet, manipulative, but I knew it would be a cold day in hell before I let him win. Ronan was like gasoline waiting to be doused on the fire that inside me, and if he was ready to burn, then so was I.
She's DARK He's COLD ni raniya_shah
43 parte Kumpleto Mature
Falling in love with an enemy knowingly is wrong. What if, it happens unknowingly? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " W-what this? " I lost the ability to speak English properly. I understood what was that but I couldn't function. My heart didn't believe this. The marriage we had cannot be fake. It didn't feel fake. " Why? Can't you understand the clearly written words? " He said. Yes, he answered me. But why was he behaving this way? I moved towards him and stood in front of him. I just can't get what this means? Was this fake? Why? What did I do to deserve this? " I c-can't understand anything," I said slowly. I just wish this comes out to be a fake thing. All of this a joke. I helplessly looked towards him. He was quiet and looked emotionless. I felt scared of his behavior for the first time. This is not true. It can't be. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Briar Eliza Shah or Eliza Joseph is a 19 years old girl - she does have a lot of DARK secrets from the horrible past. Still, she is not the innocent one or any good kinda word that can describe her, instead, she is the hard one here, incredibly stubborn but still has a heart where the good side and the painful side is buried hidden deep somewhere and there is also fear of her HUNTERS ... Here meet the one and only Cayden Donovan, he's not your only typical Greek god looking guy but also has an incredibly cold nature. He's not the one to stay back when he's scared, he fights and ends it ....ends his fears and the fear here is not any kind of failure but instead, it's the past and his search for the people in it, he is secretive and loves to keep it that way. But what will happen when he meets Briar? Cover by @chrmar04
The Bad Boys Badass ni BennieWithNoJets
29 mga parte Kumpleto
"Sorry Mr. Diper." I try saying with a straight face. "It's Mr. Piper, Kristen how many times do I have to tell you?" I pretend to think hard. "How many times have I came to pay you a visit?" "Too many Kristen, and your not paying me a visit your in trouble." "Well I don't think I'm in trouble, I got up and told everyone at the table to not touch my food." He sighed. "So when Kayden touched my food after I said no, he had to be punished." "Kristen, you don't punch someone for touching your food." He said with an annoyed tone. ____________________________________ Meet Kristen Peck, total badass, plays basketball and loves her food. Has no parents, left when she was young and only lives with her older brother Chance. Meet Logan King, the bad boy of the school, plays football the captain of the team actually, parents are rich and has two other siblings and is the oldest. What happens when Logan returns to high school and right when he walks into the cafeteria, a punch is thrown towards, what looks to be a guy who was joking around. But what happens when he looks to see who threw the punch, what happens when he sees that it was in fact Kristen. Find out, and follow these two through ups and downs. DISCLAIMER- The description does not really match the story but does at the same time. (If that makes sense) ____________________________________
Katsuki Bakugou x reader One-Shots ni ShadowBk
6 mga parte Kumpleto Mature
Just a bunch of One-Shots about our favourite hot head. I'm putting it as finished for now, since I don't really have time and ideas to continue. If I get more inspiration, I will make more, but for now, it is completed. You can ask me, and I also write Lemon/Lime/Smut. I don't write Angst, because I can't stand it. I also have a lot of Alternate Universes. :) Here is some information about you: F/N- First Name L/N- Last Name E/C- Eye Colour H/C- Hair Colour H/L- Hair Lenght
Love, Anonymous ni Liz_Plum
43 parte Kumpleto
*Completed* "I just want to know why." I say as I turn over, trying to find his figure through the dark of my room. "Why what?" He asks. "Why you're being so nice to me." I say quietly, vulnerability seeping into my words. "How we even became friends." He sighs, "I want to know how." I scrunch my brow. "How what?" His response is soft, the opposite of his sarcastic personality. "How you don't see it." ******* Reagan Holt was about as average as a high school student could be. She didn't play any sports, didn't participate in the popular activities, and wasn't the girl all the boys chased after. All except one boy. He wrote her a letter every week. Each letter described something new for him to love about her. Whether it was how beautiful her laugh was or how his heart swelled with every smile she gave, he never failed to write how he felt. So the two should be together, right? That's the way Reagan wants it, but there's just one problem. He signs his letters "Love, Anonymous." Now add an obnoxious, conceited, sex god into the equation and you get a teenage girl confused on who really loves her. The sweet, tender written anonymous lover, or the cocky, ignorant asshole? -REVIEWS- "You create such wonderful characters and I can't wait to see what happens next!" VampireSa5m41993 "Thank you for wonderful dogs and little brothers and eccentrically hormonal best friends!" -Nat-Attack "I am totally hooked on this book!" nbazinet "I love the way the story flows and that you have really roundabout characters. It's as if they're real while I'm reading!" life_is_beautiful115 "Your work is literally art." lemonsun123 "Every time I read this book it just makes me smile." Nicooole97 Cover by: -winterr
𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐲 𝐀 𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 ni -alinax
48 parte Kumpleto Mature
"You're atheist," I remind him. "You don't believe in god." "I believe in you," He murmurs, letting the cigarette hang from his lips. "I believe in whatever you believe." He says, letting the confession roll off his tongue as if it were that simple. As if god, the devil, heaven, hell-as if none of it really had meaning to him. "That's not how it works," I mutter as we walk down a few more alleyways-the city of Manhattan coated in a light blanket of snow. Henry Vitiello had never had anything to pray for, that is, until he met me-the only thing that had ever opened his mind up to the possibility of religion "Isn't it?" He argues, taking the cigarette by his middle and pointer finger before blowing the smoke out. "I'II dip my hands in holy water if it means I could touch you." "You'd probably burn." 𓆩♡𓆪 𝐇𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐘 𝐕𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐎, the reaper. He's a prick. An asshole. A pretentious son of a bitch. He's not perfect. He's not even decent. But he's hers. She could be a bottle labeled poison but he was an alcoholic, and he had drunk her empty. Now he was hungover. 𝐉𝐀𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒, the healer. She's known to be the perfect good girl, with perfect grades and a perfect life with a perfect family. They didn't know that behind the gated doors of their billion dollar estate, she was strapped down to a chair every night and picked apart just to be put back together in time for supper. 𓆩♡𓆪 star-crossed; adjective (of a person or a plan) thwarted by bad luck. 'star-crossed lovers' and that, they were. So they fucked under those very stars that tried so desperately to break them apart. 𓆩♡𓆪 ‼️DISCLAIMER ‼️ BOOK REFERENCES TO MARA DYER, SHATTER ME, MIND FUCK, ETC ARE ALL INTENTIONAL SO DONT BE RUDE. AS FOR TRIGGER WARN
Outlaw | 18+ ni devilseyez
29 mga parte Ongoing Mature
READ TRIGGER WARNINGS! In a world where power is the ultimate weapon and betrayal is currency, the line between hero and villain doesn't just blur... it shatters. She's the woman you're warned about. She's selfish and deadly, you don't see her until you feel the knife in your back. He's the man everyone fears. He's cold-blooded and dark, the embodiment of vengeance in an expensive suit. They should have destroyed each other. But instead, they made a deal. She's playing a game with no rules. He's rewriting them as he goes. Together, they're a storm no one can outrun. Loyalties are broken, alliances burned, and blood spills in their wake. But when the smoke clears, only one thing remains certain, trusting the devil doesn't make you safe... It makes you just like him. She's the sinner. He's the executioner. And in their obsession, no one gets out alive. Some stories don't have heroes. Some don't need them. This is theirs. Outlaw - where survival isn't enough, and obsession is the only law. Highest Ranks: #1 - badgirl #1 - secretsociety #1 - enemieswithbenefits #1 - antihero #2 - hacking #2 - slowburn #2 - enemies [All rights reserved, Copyright @devilseyez 2024]
The Satan's Eve (Completed)✔ NOT EDITED ni Sheewrites_4fun
51 parte Kumpleto Mature
HIGHEST RANKING-1st in wedding! {23/05/18} & 1st in Laugh! {11/08/18} 13th in Romance! {03/12/18} Sequel to Mr Hulk's Jelly Bunny->Can be read as a stand alone book. Evelina/Velina Storm is a 22 year old half human-half vampire girl who works as a Manager at a restaurant despite the fact that her family is wealthy. You can say that she is the good type of girl but once you hit a bad nerve then well...goodluck. One thing she always keeps in mind is to never show her weaknesses no matter how the situation is. Adam Vernom is a 28 year old Vampire who is also a Ceo of the Vernom Company Ltd. He is the type of guy who you never want to mess with. Of all the things he hates, there is only one which he despises the most which is mates. Adam does not believe in mates, he thinks that they only exist just to destroy lives. What will happen when these two meet? What will happen when Adam know that Velina is his mate? Will Velina resist his seducing ability? Will Adam hate her? After all she is his mate... -------- He yanked me closer to him till our breaths became one and our tips of our noses touched. My eyes bulged like freaking saucers and were staring at his hot ones. "Satan huh? Then Let me show you how he is like." In one swift movement he crashed his plum lips onto mine. I wanted to push him away but could not. I felt my knees buckled and my stomach churned. There was a strange sensation which was restraining me from pushing him away. He plunged his moist tongue inside my mouth exploring every inch of it. My heart was racing and my breaths were hot. I could not help but move in sync with his pace. It was as if it was a magnet pulling me more and more to him. ------- P.s : Please do not copy or take my ideas as they are purely original and my imaginations. Thank you. ♡Also! If you enjoyed this story don't hesitate to share it with your friends! ;)
Magugustuhan mo rin ang
Slide 1 of 10
☼Shine☼ [boyxboy] [oneshot] cover
VICENZO cover
His Greatest Sanctity cover
She's DARK He's COLD cover
The Bad Boys Badass cover
Katsuki Bakugou x reader One-Shots cover
Love, Anonymous cover
𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐲 𝐀 𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 cover
Outlaw | 18+ cover
The Satan's Eve (Completed)✔ NOT EDITED cover

☼Shine☼ [boyxboy] [oneshot]

1 parte Kumpleto Mature

They all think he’s a vampire. He thinks they’re all idiots. Also, Edward Cullen can kiss his skinny, pale ass.

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