my public journal
- Reads 116
- Votes 4
- Parts 8
this is my journal that I'm kinda just putting out there.
its not necessarily for people to read, I just like how it's on my phone and kinda like a book i don't know, read if you want lmao bye now
BIG TRIGGER WARNING PEOPLE.
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#92
bulemia
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It's Molly and not Trolly
Molly. A young teenage girl struggling with her weight. People in school often call her "Trolly" - it's like her nickname. In school she's a popular victim. Chase. A young teenage boy. Lost his mother a year ago. She died because she was overweighted. In school he's the popular quarterback and he fullfills every cliché exsiting. Chase's target is Molly. He's the bully. He destroys her entire life. But when he realises, what he's doing can end another life, because of the same reason.. he starts to overthink his actions... What will happen when his mind and actions change. What made him change. And what will he do with her when he is not bullying her. How will Molly react. What will she think about this sudden change. (Contents Selfharm, Depression and suicidal thoughts please read at your own risk. You are loved❤️)Complete
Diary of an anorexic
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My overprotective brothers
Chloe Clarkson is 15 years old and lives with her 10 older, overprotective, defensive, annoying brothers who will stop at nothing to keep her safe. When Chloe was six her mother and her father took Chloe to her dance competition but on their way home they got into an accident sadly her parents died leaving the oldest brother, Tom in charge. Since then Chloe has dealt with many mental health issues such as anxiety, depression and bipolar disorder. Chloe's anxiety is so bad she has a stutter when she is away from home, isn't with her brothers and when she isn't with her friends. She has an anxiety attack almost everyday. One day her and her brother fight leading to her family falling into a ditch. Finally Chloe is fed up of her family fighting and forgives. Everything comes out but when her brothers react speechless to a sad memory Chloe tell she takes it as a sign in a bad way. Chloe takes a step into water. Her brothers have to say a goodbye? They don't know is she'll wake up. Chloe is in hospital lifeless and her family and friends surround her.. Will she wake up or will she take a trip to her parents? A new guy in class? The bad boy starts getting me involved? A new group of friends? What happens when things start to turn over for Chloe? She becomes more confident and gains more trust. But as the same time she cracks. It's a bumpy ride but she has plenty of help along the way- lets just hope her brothers don't interfere to much on the ride. Warning may be triggering involves; eating disorders, self harm, anxiety, bullying, violence and bad language. I do not influence these in any way and self harm is not the answer. If anyone needs to talk I'm always here as I have had my fair share of bad doings xxxxxComplete
My Dark Poetry
Some poems that I write mostly how I feel, I don't know why I'm publishing this I guess I just felt like it. So I hope you at least like them. Please no negative comments. If you have any questions or suggestions please pm me. Yeah so that's pretty much it. Thanks bye, also vote, comment, pm, and enjoy.Complete
The Twisted Mind
"I felt as if I didn't belong, And I felt as if i'm not sick enough" Alfie struggles with the concept of food. He loves it, he hates it and just wants to find peace with it and within himself. He wants to make up with his body, his mind but he's lost all control so he's finding it hard to live. Alfie Hailo, a 16 year old swimmer, has been struggling with food since the age of 13. His parents put him in dance class when he was 6 but he was getting bullied as he got older, so decided to quit and choose a more 'masculine' sport.His father also left the family home 2 years prior and has been struggling to understand why. He has amazing friends, and an amazing family who love and care for him dearly but, he doesn't feel this. He feels like he has to be perfect. With the pressure of school, and having to keep up to the social norms of a professional swimmer, it's hard for Alfie to concentrate. He needs the help. And to do this, Alvin helps. Alvin helps him find his worth, take control, and makes his life easier, or so he seems. His best friends, Killian and Ruby, know Alfie inside and out. They know his family life, school life. And this is because Alfie is a simple person. He has never had a detention, nor has he been expelled. He's a straight A student with no history of alcohol or drug abuse. Will they suspect anything? How will Alfie proceed with his excruciating pain. Will he cover it up or will he find the courage to speak up and seek help?Complete
Falling Apart
*TRIGGER WARNING: DEALS WITH DEPRESSION, SELF HARM AND SUICIDE* Amber is sixteen years old and to sugarcoat it... She hasn't had the best upbringing. She would love a different life, one where she can see her mother again and not be stuck with her abusive father. A life where she doesn't get taunted and hit and torn apart by everyone who she has ever seen. But she would never swap, she doesn't want anyone to endure the pain she's gone through. So instead, she tries to get rid of it... Again. But much to her disbelief, she is saved by the people she would least expect. She learns secrets about them that no one else knows. She feels included. Cared for. And dare I say it... She felt loved. For once in her life, she felt truly happy to be alive. But just when Amber felt safe, her life was flipped upside down and her past came back to haunt her just when she least expected it... (Sorry, I suck at descriptions, don't let it put you off) Ranking: #64 in Awareness #15 in Mental Health Awareness #73 in saddnessComplete
Lost
Sometimes, I'm not always sure what to do. I feel like I'm always wrong, like I'm never good enough. I'm invisible and it's as if I don't exist. If I really didn't exist, I don't think anyone would care. I'm all alone in this great big world, I'm lost. Maddie has never been good enough for anyone. Her perfect sister, Megan, always manages to outshine her. Her father never pays attention to her, because he's always worried about Megan. Every Tuesday and Thursday, Maddie goes to group therapy, where she shares her feelings. Every week it's the same thing, until Maddie gets a new lab partner: Zach Williams, every girl's dream date. WARNING: I wrote this book when I was really, really young. It is very poorly written and has a TON of grammatical errors. I'm working on editing/rewriting this.Complete
It Wasn't Love ✔️
"Fuck." He whispers into my neck, sending a thrill of excitement through my body. His lips still smothered kisses over my neck and his hands roamed my body, starting at my chest, going down to my stomach. Caressing my soft skin, his thumb trailed circles on my groin before slightly slipping into the waistband of my jeans. My breath catches in my throat as I pull at the hoodie that covered his chiselled body. Understanding, Jacob pulls it off in one swift movement before attaching his lips back on my neck. Sucking and biting it before flicking his tongue over the sore spot. A quiet moan leaves my mouth and I clasp my hand over it, denying any noise to escape. "You drive me fucking crazy, Aria." ---------------------------- Aria Bailey finds it hard to fit in. Her parents are always busy and never have time for her. She lives alone at her family home and has top grades in all of her classes. But being a 17 year old friendless nerd comes with its disadvantages. The bullying gets worse every single day, driving her to self harm and suicidal thoughts. Aria learns more about popular boy, Jacob Rickson and starts developing feelings for the well known 18 year old. Jacob helps her come out of her shell and learn to be more comfortable and confident. Aria has to make a tough decision by choosing if she would rather be with Jacob and be bullied by her mind for eternity, or to leave and be left alone, exactly how she wants to be. -Strangers to lovers -Right person, wrong timeComplete
Monsters Inside My Head
WARNING: Some pieces may contain triggers for those who struggle with any form of depression or self harm. Please read with caution. I will often rearrange the chapters in the way I see fit, so please be patient and keep that in mind. This is my first attempt at poetry. It will consist of shit that I've gone through/dealt with and ramblings from my screwed up mind. These works are purely fictional and not meant to be taken literally.Complete
Just A Thought
Something tragic has happened. A 17 year old Valeri has to move to her dad's place. She spent all her life thinking he was dead. Her now dead mother told her that. Not knowing she has a twin brother she flies over the country and meets him there. She comes back into lives of people she once knew and loved. Not just her family. But someone else. A boy who took care of her when she was struggling. Her best friend. Valeri is dealing with addictions and when something at her new home happens, she sinks even lower. It might not end well for her. But she has friends now. Her kind brother, two funny friends and someone else she once knew... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Heyy! This is my first book. 1. I want to make it clear that English is not my first language and there might be writing mistakes. 2. ⚠️BEFORE YOU START READING CHECK TWs BELOW⚠️ 3. I myself struggle with an addiction and I think writing this book will help me process everything. That's another reason why I'm doing it. 4. You're welcome to comment but leave if you're here to write hate comments. I don't care what you think. 5. If you're here just for smut this is not a book for you. There might be some scenes but not many. This story is about struggling, dealing and fighting with addictions. 6. I'll post a new chapter every few days. I have a lot of schoolwork but I'll try my best. ⚠️TRIGGER WARNINGS: panic and anxiety attacks, self harm, sexual assault and rape, eating disorder, drinking and smoking, weed, pills, drug addiction, overdose, suicide attempt, depression, ptsd, swearing, mature content TROPES: -childhood best friend -friends to lovers -brother's best friend -who did this to you? -one bed trope I'LL PROBABLY ADD SOME MORE I hope you'll enjoy it!Complete
Molly. A young teenage girl struggling with her weight. People in school often call her "Trolly" - it's like her nickname. In school she's a popular victim. Chase. A young teenage boy. Lost his mother a year ago. She died because she was overweighted. In school he's the popular quarterback and he fullfills every cliché exsiting. Chase's target is Molly. He's the bully. He destroys her entire life. But when he realises, what he's doing can end another life, because of the same reason.. he starts to overthink his actions... What will happen when his mind and actions change. What made him change. And what will he do with her when he is not bullying her. How will Molly react. What will she think about this sudden change. (Contents Selfharm, Depression and suicidal thoughts please read at your own risk. You are loved❤️)
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