The Third Salvatore ; Another Brother

The third Salvatore brother.

''The pain, It is insufferable. I barely know what feeling I immerse in most. Anger? Rage. Sadness? Loneliness. Rage or betrayal? Both. But nothing compares to the pain that strikes my every touch of consciousness. I want to turn it off. All of it. No more sinking in sorrow and getting consumed by all forms of hurt. Turning it off would give me a chance of freedom, freedom of drowning by choice. Sinking into a depth of indifference. But I know that every time I drown I will only dive deeper into a life I did not choose to live.
But despite my desire of living cold-blooded. My hunger for blood cannot be contained. And as much as I despise the idea of having to depend on this emotion out of all, I know that without the madness that my position has caused me. I may not ever leave this position at all.

I have no hope of someone remembering. Someone caring or another bothering to save me. But I did not have hope of ever being honored by the presence of a stranger again either... Yet I was.

If the woman had not come to me I would have probably shut it off a long time ago. My thirst for relief of this pain is almost as striking as the pain the liquid I'm in is causing me. I wish I could say I remembered people saying that drowning is a more peaceful death, but I truly cannot recall voices. I only hear the silent screaming off my lungs and the groaning of my mind. The sound is getting surpassed by my worthless attempt of escaping.

And as much as I fail to escape, I am slowk ioly freed of my thoughts and pain as I can feel I'm sinking away again. The deeper I go the more it seems to hurt. The burning sensation of vervain water entering my body. As much as the pain torments me, It cannot surpass the hurt that it brings to my soul, seeing how I have yet again managed to die without finding the relief of really doing so. Knowing that I will wake up again only to suffer as much as the last time, drowning. Just like is happening now...