Masking My Pain

I live in a world most couldn't handle.
Don't get me wrong.
I have some special blessings in my life Who are always there for me.
But I don't even let them see all of me.
I can't...
Dont think they could handle how truly hard it is for me.

I take things as they come.
Can't dwell on the lil things
Don't have the time or energy
Life throws too many big things for me to manage first.
Some days I dont know how I am going to make it thru the next hour...
Lil lone the rest of day or the next day.

Somedays I'm just go thru the motions.
Getting thru on auto pilot.
Only way ill be able to do what needs to be done.
Doing my best to do my jobs..
Without having to feel anything.
Or as lil as possible.
Or I wld crurl into & cry day away.
Don't have time & life don't stop long enough for me to do that.

So I must put my plastic smile on...
While doing my best to keep going forward through my day.
Doing best I can to not let the world to see the pain inside of me.