The H Word

"I swear if you call me that one more time-"
Lane smirks tauntingly, "What? Hipster?"
I have been called that repeatedly for the past week, and it's all his fault. I don't get all butt hurt about doing things or listening to band first.
Sure, I listened to TØP way before "Stressed Out" came on the radio, but I don't go shoving that information down everyone's throat!
"I will sever your balls from the rest of you."
Lane continues to smirk-even while talking! How is that possible?
"I've done my research on hipsters such as yourself. Your threats are meaningless; all talk and no action."
Research? As if. One needs a brain to be able to process information, and Lane does not contain one in his big head.
"You would know all about all talk and no action. Studies say that those who talk about their sex lives excessively actually get none at all."
Now it's my turn to smirk as Lane loses his, and does that thing when he sucks in the right corner of his bottom lip.
"I could show you my skills in bed, H. All you have to do is ask."