How to Handle Social Inclinations

[BEING REVISED/COMPLETED] REVISED 16TH EDITION: A comprehensive recollection of all the things hazardous in the Phlegmatic and Neurotic Sapphire Mazes life, currently:

1) An unending loathing of all teenage-kind, despite being one herself.
2) The irresponsible but often (questionably) well-meaning older sister.
3 )A persnickety mother with almost functionable obsessive compulsive disorder.
4) The ghost of Frank Sinatra is actually haunting her. No joke. And he won't stop playing his own songs.
5) Her family's penchant for death.
6) A bad personal history with mental illness (re: neurotic).
7) Words that she cannot say and fears she cannot express.

And yet, as if these things aren't harming enough, life forgos the lemons and throws watermelons by letting her come into acquaintance with the tactlessly sarcastic Tristan Mitchell; a boy of which who brings along with over-the-top gingers and eight-year-old philosophers that all put roadblocks in Sapphire's self-inflicted solitude, forcing her to feel a lot more feelings than she's comfortable with.

(Featuring but not limited to: the ghost of Frank Sinatra, fajitas, dead people, demon claws, fiends, the ghost of Frank Sinatra, some lesbians, more than one redhead, a white person(s), Jesus Christ, fourth-wall breaks, an [annoyingly] conscious narrator, the ghost of Frank Sinatra, and more!)