My life as it is

My life as it is

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WpMetadataReadOngoing<5 mins
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Mon, Feb 1, 2016
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Non-Fiction
WARNING;really sad story not to be read for mocking, hating and dramatic people this is reality. I have always been judged by my actions, words and habits. Each time I say something people around me act like I'm not there, have you felt the real power of hatred and how it can affect your personality? I have been through a lot of stress and loneliness. Have you survived a day, week, month or year without a friend? Now I don't care about what happens and soon I'm sure I won't care about my life. THIS IS NOT FAKE FOR THOSE CARELESS, HEARTLESS PEOPLE WHO THINK THAT I'M MAKING IT UP FOR ATTENTION BECAUSE NO ONE HAS PAID ATTENTION TO ME SO WHY BOTHER TRYING AFTER SO MANY YEARS, IT'S USELESS TRYING AFTER WHO KNOWS HOW LONG.
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#385
cruelty
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***this book contains suicidal thoughts and tendencies, may not be appropriate for younger audiences*** In which she looks for the purpose of life. Lily Carter's parents died in a car crash leaving her and Laura, girl was depressed long before her parents passed away and with all the problems turning up now, Lily felt more miserable - if that's even possible. With her journey to look for life's purpose and grab the small pinch of HOPE - which is ironically her second name -, will she finally snap at the pressure and finally end it all? or will a small light lit her darkened world of grief and loneliness? * "So you know. The little goth girl who gets bullied is indeed a mess. There's this mess in her head that eats her alive everyday isn't it? What to do now Kaden? Tell the whole neighborhood and recieve an award for taking out a crazy in this world?" I spit like vomit. His eyes warmed up as I finished, "Lily. It isn't like that" "What is it then? People stopped caring... they gave up, why aren't you?" I fought my tears. "Because I feel the need to care. Did Leigh hurt you? Did she hit you?" he finally noticed the unusual redness of my cheek. I don't like the way he told me he needed to care for me. I felt like an obligation, a responsibility that he is carrying and carrying leads to getting tired and when people gets tired, they give up. I don't want them to give up on me. But they will, so it's good not to make them care for me in the first place. "I never needed anyone. I stopped needing anyone before, why start now?" I uttered the words again. Why? There is nothing to fight for. No mama. No papa. No sister to love me. No one. So why would I waste my life and the time of others to fix what is already broken - and someone who doesn't want to be fixed? If I may add. Maybe I gave up. No, scratch that. I gave up a long time ago - when my parents died, my hope and purpose went away with them.

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