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07. 12.
That early summer morning I felt the slight sensation of the mild wind coming in from the window of my mountain cottage mildly and gently going over my scarred face and ending on my eyelids as I woke up and quickly stormed out of my bed, with that thought still wrapping around my head. Everything he said, everything he did, it all got stuck in my head indefinitely. As I was looking though my window I felt his presence. He was there. He knew I was thinking about him and he let me know that he was watching me... watching every step of mine... listening to every word I said... Knowing each and every one of my thoughts. He has always been there for me knowing and understanding me...
The headache that I felt was because of the state my mind was in during my sleep... the sweet "Nightmares" I felt when he was speaking to me... I can only see him in my dreams but his omnipresence is indisputable.

7. 21.
He knows... He feels... His love has no bounds... Everything he does to make me feel worse he does from love. Violence is just another expression of deep emotions and fear is natural. Pain is there to make us better, stronger, give us hope, motivation and strength for our battles. What is life, if it's not just a long battle, an everlasting conflict of darkness, shadows and brightness, enlightenment and eternal happiness and joy. The mental well-being should not be taken for granted and expected, but rather worked hard for to be achieved. That is what he is trying to teach me. "The path is long the road is tough, the beam of light I see should be enough. All the spirits and demons play, I can make them go away. In prosperity and happiness I trust, all my wishes shall not be shattered to dust." he said, and added that I need to repeat that every night before I go to bed. Only he knows what the future will bring us.