Rant /note - Ashthekiller12135 - Wattpad

Rant /note

Ashthekiller12135

Reads 21
Votes 1
Parts 2
Time <5 mins

Reads 21
Votes 1
Parts 2
Time <5 mins

Ashthekiller12135

Mature

depression forgotten hatred lonely suicide

I'm fucking tired of this. I just can't fucking take it no more. I'm so fucking on the edge of killing myself that i don't care any more. God isn't forgiving so why should I listen to what others say anymore. He won't help me he won't help any of us. My heart, mind, body and spirit can't handle this anymore. I tried to stay strong for others but I can't anymore. I'm sick of this world we inhabit that I call Hell. People are so caught up with shit like popularity and image that they don't have a heart l, mind or should to just look at someone who's alone and say at least a "Hello!" Or a "How are you/how's your day?". This world has gotten so cruel that even our 'protectors' are just the same. Parents don't look at their children and play with them like they used to. All caught up in technology, a un-living unemotional thing, and not see the wonderful things infront of them. No one takes the time to look at the girl or boy who smiles every day and see in their eyes the pain and sadness.All Rights Reserved

depression forgotten hatred lonely suicide

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DO OVER 100 by kikasmiling

Screams! Thats all I could hear , as I lay on sidewalk covered in a pool of my own blood . "Am I really gonna die....like this " I said with a heavy sigh . Ive never lived a very fulfilling life but that didn't mean I wanted to die . there was so much I wanted to do , to fix . my parents don't give a shit bout me so Im probably gonna be thrown in a public cemetery. I know this is a long shot but If there is a god out there , plz just one chance , it cant end like this ....

The Girl who Never Noticed. by reeema10

I don't know what to feel towards him. My brain -my heart- gives me mixed feelings about him: every time our eyes lock, I feel warm inside. Every time we talk, I feel myself drown into feelings; nervousness, shyness. I'm not sure. And every time he casually walk into my mind, my stomach squeezes lightly with butterflies which I cannot justify. Yet, he makes me cry myself to sleep, he makes me overthink myself to sleep. Not that he said or did anything, it's the confusion that makes me ache. Sometimes even the butterflies and sparks hurt me, the thought of him tightens my chest with ache, as confusion crawls my skin. We're friends, but he shows mixed signals that confuses me. That's just one side of the story. The other side is suffering too, he's been in love with Evelyn ever since he laid eyes on her, but she just saw Zachary as a friend. And it gnaws at him that she never notices his eyes. But not fate, neither destiny will bring them together. Coincidence does...

Immortal (boy x boy) by Love2LoveYaoi

My life has always been terrible. I was always bullied at school. I don't know why, it just seemed that people didn't like my presence. The guys would beat me up and I'd get in trouble when I defended myself, for the teachers never saw what they did. The girls would trick me, making me think they liked me and laughing at me because of it. I was always in the principle's office for one reason or another, but I wasn't a bad student. I actually got really good grades. To make matters worse, my mother wanted nothing to do with me. She'd lock me in the basement, sometimes for days, with no food or warmth. My father would then sneak down and beat me before raping me. So, naturally, I wanted to die. But, for some reason, I can't die. No matter what I do, I can't stay dead. The thing I want more than anything is far out of my reach. Why can't I just die? Warning: mention of rape, suicide, and abuse. Also, this is a boy's love story.

Living hell by annsgirls

" You are really beautiful Nivi...... oh I am sorry Actually it slipped out accidentally. I heard your mom addressing you as Nivi that's why " when this man sitting in front of me who is handsome and damn hot addressed me as Nivi all those hatred with which I came to meet him blown away. My eyes becomes soft and wet. I quickly put my head down and looked at floor to hide those stupid tears. Siddarth Singh Khurana, most prominent business tycoon of South Asia.Current head of Khurana's business empire. Most eligible bachelor, youngest and successful business man. " I think I can't even imagine any other girl beside me as my bride other than you " his deep husky voice made a tingling sensation all over my body. why this is happening to me? I came to say a no for this marriage whoever he is. I stopped dreaming about my future then why I am having second thoughts now. He remembers me of a person whom I really miss. The way he called my name as Nivi was enough for me to break that stone wall inside my heart. " Nivedita look at me once." I slowly raised my head and met his dark eyeballs. " I promise you I won't let you regret this marriage. I will give all happiness for you. At first it was just a business marriage for me but after meeting you I got admired by your simplicity. please say yes" he looked at me with those hopeful eyes. I didn't say anything but I nod my head as yes and he was overwhelmed by my yes. " Thank you, thank you so much " he held my both hands and said. ................ This was the last happiest conversation I remember which I has with my so called husband who is now laying on his bed and beating out of shit from me. I regret that each and every moment when I agreed for this marriage. I can't even cry loudly to forget this immense pain all over my body because if he heard my sound he might kill me and I can't die like at any cost. I need to survive and I don't know like what I did to this family they are treating me like a shit.

My friend, Demise by latestonir

Every sound in my world is amplified due to the silence. Every footstep, every ticking clock in every classroom, every pen that clicks or drops to the floor, every little sharp sound is so loud in my head that it pisses me off. I also don't do well under pressure, but I'm always trying so hard to calm down that it puts me under even more pressure. I only know two emotions and have my whole life. I've only ever been those two. I don't get sad, I don't feel happy or exited. I'm either angry or unbearably lonely. I'm grade school, some kids thought I was the devil. I'm not. I'm just....I'm just different. So don't go around thinking I'm some kind of demon, okay?!

~Trust Me ~ by insanelysane2552

"I want a divorce." And just hearing him say that my whole world that seemed to revolve around him stopped. Gathering myself I barely managed to speak in a voice that even I could not recognise. I couldn't comprehend anything going around me. "Wh..hy?" As soon as the words left my mouth he threw the file and the photographs spread across the floor. And those photographs had me in compromising positions with not one but several men. Looking at those photos I looked straight into his eyes. Disgust and hatred. The only emotions I could see. Taking a deep breath I composed myself and tried to keep my face void of the emotions I felt at that moment. Hurt and immense pain. If he didn't trust me then he has no right to see me vulnerable too. "Is this the only reason why you want to divorce me? No other except this?" It was foolish of me to ask him but I had to make sure. Also for me trust comes before love. If he doesn't trust me I don't even want to save the relationship. "Is this not enough you whore? What else can I expect from a slut and a gold digger like you! I knew it from the start that all you showed was just a facade. Your innocence, kindness, it was all fake. I just don't believe how can I be so dumb." Was I hurt? No I was broken beyond repair. My heart ached. I felt like I was seconds away from collapsing. I had far exceeded the limit of hurt and pain. I was so powerless in that moment that I couldn't even fight with him. Love makes you strong. I have heard and felt that countless times but they always forget to mention what comes after that. Love makes you weak too. I couldn't shout at him because I loved him. But I had to be brave. For myself. ************************************************** Is love enough for two people to be together or is there something more important than love? This is story of Xander and Sophie who loved each other but still couldn't be together. Because more important than love is trust. © All rights reserved

Not me. (2023) by MineOnlyFriend2

so, I've been struggling for a long time now, and I never told anyone about it. I've never opened up. but I met someone who understands how I feel, and I'm beginning to feel again. I don't know how to do it, but I finally feel I can fight. I've been so exhausted. I'm not better, I'm not sure if i ever will be, but I'm not numb, not entirely. I can't say how I'm feeling, or what i am going to write, but if you want it, it's here. This is for you. For everyone who was made to be the villain by those meant to be by their sides. For everyone with a sensitive heart made to grow strong much too quickly. For everyone who struggles to get out of bed in the morning. For everyone who never could find the words to say why. For everyone who struggles to feel and for everyone who feels too much. For everyone who had to pick themselves back up. For everyone who had to parent themselves. For everyone fighting an invisible battle. For everyone who has been underestimated. For everyone who has to flee to other worlds to cope. For everyone who found other means to silence their voices. For everyone who was silenced. For everyone who was over powered. For everyone who was made to be less. For everyone who had to watch someone else suffer and stay silent. For everyone asking themselves, why? Why would you do this? What did I do? Why is this happening to me? It was never your fault.

My Silenced Cries by Love_Albrecht

This isn't a story, its not a fairy tale, its nothing but what goes through my head and what makes me... me? There is no happy ending, just life's ups and downs. Ranting and venting, things I can't tell people face to face. These are the silenced cries for help that rattle through my head. Waiting for someone to listen.

Unknowingly Halal (lawful) by love_angell20

I stare at him horrified. it couldn't happen my life was already ruined, and I don't want it to be ruined any further. No! It can't happen! I screamed in my head and clutched my head with both of my hands. "No. I don't want this" I whisper shaking visibly. "Adiba... please calm down... listen I want to tell you something.. just calm down" he tried to calm me down in a very gentle voice but how can I? did he forget what he did to me? if he then I will remind him. I look up at him and wipe my tears furiously and clean my face. sighing I said. "I want to abort" I exclaimed and his gentle face turned into his usually angry face. "What the f*ck did you say?" he yelled and take step toward me. but I didn't flinch this time and matched his angry face with mine. "I said I want to abort this sinful thing!" I screamed at top of my lungs. "Shut the fu*k up, Adiba! this is not a thing and not sinful at all" he screamed back grabbing my both arms. and I gave him hateful glared "It is! did you forget you RAPE me!" I screamed and he suddenly left my arms and hurt made its way to his eyes. "Did you forget you RAPE a married woman" I yelled grabbing his collar. "I didn't! But still, it's not a sinful thing Adiba... it's our... It's our halal child... Your my.. my WIFE Adiba!" He said his voice cracking and a lone tear escaped his eyes and I was staring at him like he lost his mind. How can I be his wife? I am already married to someone else. ****** #1 in emotional. 15/10/2020 #2 in emotional. 18/10/2020 #1 in obsession 11/03/2021 #1 in Muslim 11/03/2021

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Slide 1 of 9

DO OVER 100 cover

The Girl who Never Noticed. cover

Immortal (boy x boy) cover

Living hell cover

My friend, Demise cover

~Trust Me ~ cover

Not me. (2023) cover

My Silenced Cries cover

Unknowingly Halal (lawful) cover

DO OVER 100

Screams! Thats all I could hear , as I lay on sidewalk covered in a pool of my own blood . "Am I really gonna die....like this " I said with a heavy sigh . Ive never lived a very fulfilling life but that didn't mean I wanted to die . there was so much I wanted to do , to fix . my parents don't give a shit bout me so Im probably gonna be thrown in a public cemetery. I know this is a long shot but If there is a god out there , plz just one chance , it cant end like this ....