Pull The Trigger.

Everyone always talks about knowing what death and depression feels like when their mixed together, let me just tell you this much that I know. No one knows what those two things feel like when their aiming a gun at their best friend, the one they grew up and graduated with; the one they had memories and sleepovers with. No one freaking knows how it feels when your best friend goes around killing people, because her boss told her it was her "job" no one knows how it feels when you two are standing there in the rain, staring into each others eyes as flashbacks race through your mind and tears stream down your cheeks, that is when you pull the trigger, because... not only did your boss tell you too, but so did all of your friends; and in your heart. You knew you needed too.
Now, you know what death and depression would feel like, to know you are the reason you will no longer see your best friend; the one you shared laughs and smiles with. Because you are the one that pulled the trigger.