Hikaru finally realises his undying love for haruhi and struggles to keep it a secret. He can't confess to her because he doesn't know how she will react, and even though he loves her he doesn't want to ruin their friendship. He then starts to express himself in a journal, but then looses it and hopes that she isn't the one to find it. (I just found this after about 2 years, this was my very first fanfic, so please forgive me if its not too good. I didnt make changes cause i wanted it to stay original, for the memory.)