𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒 -ᴊ.ɢ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ-
|| MATURE THEMES: SUICIDE ||
10 days is,
240 hours,
Or 14400 minutes,
Or 864000 seconds.
That's how much time they had
together before her last breath.
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I hadn't told a single soul about how I felt, including Johnnie. He would tell me his issues, and I'd help him in every way that I could. I didn't let anybody know, and I don't hold that against anyone that was in my life. I kept my problems hidden for a number of reasons, I felt hopeless, alone, and mostly afraid. I didn't want people to see how I was really doing, I wanted to keep up with the persona of that 'enthusiastic girl on YouTube'
I don't blame him, and I don't blame my subscribers for not noticing. I hid it well, maybe even too well with the amount of dread I was in. I loved Johnnie, and I'll always love him, he helped me without even realizing it. All this pain, all this anger, flushed away by his presence. He was the love of my life.
So I made a plan,
10 days,
10 possibilities,
10 possible outcomes.
I would give myself 10 days to live my life to the fullest, so on that horrific last day -the 10th day- I could determine my suicide. I would look for hope within that ten days, and if I found something to stay for, I would get help. If things got worse, then that was going to be my last day.
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STARTED: October 17, 2023
FINISHED: October 22. 2033
★ ★ ★
