The perfect pact
- Reads 35
- Votes 1
- Parts 4
Ongoing5m
Last published Wed, Sep 4, 2019
3 Siblings, and their journey to adulthood.
I feel like I keep everyone at a distance. I don't connect like they think I do. If I had to leave today and never see them again I would be ok, but am I? It's almost like I'm waiting for something to go wrong like I'm bunkering down in my room like a boom shelter to protect myself from getting hurt. I focus on details in the future so I can be as prepared as possible, or at least that's what I tell myself. Honestly I probably focus on the future because I will finally be free and feel like an actual person not a piece of property to fight over. They want me just to say they have me, just to rub it in the others face, just to try and prove something to everyone else. It has little to do with actually wanting me in their everyday life or knowing what's best for me. I genuinely believe that's what they have used to convince themselves they're doing what's right. Does that make it ok? They don't see all their faults so there not real, and they have forgotten all the bad moment so they didn't happen. At least thats what they try and convince us when we bring up anything from the past. It's always (rolls eyes) " I'm not talking about this it's stupid." So my feelings are stupid? You didn't feel that way in the situation so I'm wrong for how I felt and perceived it. The best part are the divided sides to the story so you always question both sides ending up even more confused to begin with. It's almost like they don't want us to truly know who they are. They want us to have a perfect image, but if that image is a blanket over the truth then everything else is a lie. When does it end? Will it ever? Is there a magic age when we can hear the truth, and know all the realities of each situation completely? Me personally I'm not going to waste my time waiting for a day that will never come. In the future when they ask why we don't have a closer relationship I'm going to blanket the truth because I learned that from the best.
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From the second you're in this world they tell you what is fair. What questions your allowed to ask and the ones you can never dare say. I find it damn near funny that most of you are reading this and know exactly what I mean. They put you on the path they've paved for you as kids we don't question it or even wonder if it's right for you. But beyond your paths edges is a land made up of risks and dangers. You feared it they tell you no good will come from it but how do you really know? Truth be told I was the girl who had her whole life planned out for her, straight A's, best friend, and two loving parents. I know what I wanted what I needed and I knew how to fight like hell for it. There's a reason why everyone prefers pretty lies over the bitter truth and it's usually because they can't handle the truth but I think the most likely thing is they can't handle what happens to the person once the truth comes out that's what happened to me. I was happy the way things were and then one day everything blew up in my face. Maybe the happy girl I was would have been happy living a lie for the rest of her life but no matter what the truth always comes out. So I ask you what would you have wanted the bitter truth or the pretty lie?
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