Funny Jokes
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New Girl
"You dropped this." I heard a husky voice say. I turned around to look at what I dropped and realized it was my schedule. I gasped. Damn, I would have been fucked if I'd lost it. I guess I didn't put it in my bag... I looked up to thank him, but ended up not being able to find my voice. He's really attractive. Drop dead gorgeous attractive. Hot. He has brown hair that is spiked up in a messy way and shiny chocolate brown eyes that are hard not to stare at. His jawline was firm and he is extremely tall compared to my 5'3" height; he seems like he's 6'1". He looks in good shape -- the white shirt he was wearing showed off his broad muscular chest. He wore a leather-mans jacket from the school over the t-shirt, with black denim jeans, and converse. I swallowed. I snapped out of it and took the paper forcing myself to say "thanks." However, he walked away before I even finished. OK... he obviously isn't interested in the 'new girl' like all the other students are. I can't help but feel a bit disappointed. Out of all the guys that have hit on me in school today he is the only one that has caught my eye -- bad news is that he didn't even bother. "You know him? I'm surprised the cheer-bitch hasn't threatened you yet." Jessica said, her face showing shock. "Um, no I don't know him... and cheer-bitch?" I frowned confused. "She's his ex-girlfriend, but considering she has such a small brain that is a size of a peanut, she won't leave him alone. I mean like seriously, EX; has she not heard of that quote, 'Thanks for the EXperience, Our time has EXpired, now EXit my life.' She is one clueless bimbo. Then again who would leave him alone he is S-E-X-Y!" I laughed. "I am going to love being your friend." I said while I looked back to where he had headed a while ago, but I no longer saw him. I sighed disappointed.Concluida
Laugh.Com
Did you know that its good for you to laugh? No? well damn! It's good i'm saying it now then! It's good i'm here to help you guys to 'not' die, you're welcome. The most of these jokes I have found on the internet, so don't come bitching about copyrighting and everything. Thank you.Concluida
Text Me Back
"Hi, it's me again. The pathetic guy who just got dumped, if that jogs your memory. If talking is still on the table I'd love to take you up on that offer...text me back" That was all it took to start a frienship but many late night conversations will start something else....Concluida
Coffee & Cats | ✔
"I may work here, but that doesn't mean I drink coffee." "Why?" "Well, why dont you like cats?" "I'm allergic to cats." "Then, let's just say I'm allergic to coffee." #5 in Short Story [7/15/16] Book Three From Texts and Calls Series © Copyrights ReservedConcluida
The Number On The Napkin
"Is your refrigerator running?" "No, my refrigerator is not running." "Well you better...wait, what?" "Actually, it broke down a week ago because it knew that you were going to call with that stupid line and it decided it would rather die than listen to you say it. So now, thanks to you, I don't have a fridge and all of my food has gone bad." • • • Sometimes you find the crucial answers in the weirdest of places...and people.Concluida
Fake Number
"Hey cute guy I met in Starbucks!" "Um.. hello? I'm sorry but I don't work in Starbucks" "Oh shit, did I type the number in wrong?" ...Concluida![mememe › bbno$ [2]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/222679528-256-k764137.jpg)
mememe › bbno$ [2]
[PART 2] SEQUELLLS- which aren't really as good as the original one. [If you haven't read the first book go do that !] started: 4-27-19 Finished: t-b-d **DISCLAIMER** This book involves cussing and inappropriate jokes. Read at you're own risk.Concluida
Book of Weirdness
DO you know what makes this joke book different from ALL the other joke books on this website? NOTHING So if you don't find my jokes funny, after the first 50, other joke books shall greet you. *I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE JOKES*Concluida
"You dropped this." I heard a husky voice say. I turned around to look at what I dropped and realized it was my schedule. I gasped. Damn, I would have been fucked if I'd lost it. I guess I didn't put it in my bag... I looked up to thank him, but ended up not being able to find my voice. He's really attractive. Drop dead gorgeous attractive. Hot. He has brown hair that is spiked up in a messy way and shiny chocolate brown eyes that are hard not to stare at. His jawline was firm and he is extremely tall compared to my 5'3" height; he seems like he's 6'1". He looks in good shape -- the white shirt he was wearing showed off his broad muscular chest. He wore a leather-mans jacket from the school over the t-shirt, with black denim jeans, and converse. I swallowed. I snapped out of it and took the paper forcing myself to say "thanks." However, he walked away before I even finished. OK... he obviously isn't interested in the 'new girl' like all the other students are. I can't help but feel a bit disappointed. Out of all the guys that have hit on me in school today he is the only one that has caught my eye -- bad news is that he didn't even bother. "You know him? I'm surprised the cheer-bitch hasn't threatened you yet." Jessica said, her face showing shock. "Um, no I don't know him... and cheer-bitch?" I frowned confused. "She's his ex-girlfriend, but considering she has such a small brain that is a size of a peanut, she won't leave him alone. I mean like seriously, EX; has she not heard of that quote, 'Thanks for the EXperience, Our time has EXpired, now EXit my life.' She is one clueless bimbo. Then again who would leave him alone he is S-E-X-Y!" I laughed. "I am going to love being your friend." I said while I looked back to where he had headed a while ago, but I no longer saw him. I sighed disappointed.
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