Becky-Sue

Leave me alone in the darkness
Where I nest and nurse my sadness
I'll try to develop like a photograph
Like it does in a dark room
I doubt a film exposed to the light would
But then I wonder if it's good
Everyone one of you regards me as a nobody
Like the unclear undeveloped negatives
So right now it's just me
Solitary
In this black void, I have many motives
But been so lone, I feel so hopeless
I'm trapped on one side of a river
I don't have a canoe
But I don't want to remain here
In this darkness, I'll learn to swim
I'll jump in and swim the current
Powerful strokes until I win

But for now I'm balled up in my corner
My loneliness haunts me like an Amityville horror
I spend hours thinking how I've hopelessly failed
Hoping one day I'll be someone's whole world
But then again, the same loneliness comforts me
Because to you, I'm a nobody
I'm the bad under developed one
My negatives were over exposed
I hate you for making me feel lonely
Yet I need you to take away this lonely feeling

But from those negatives, I'll try develop
Like a photograph
Should I happen to do,
And you do think I'm somebody
Like the vibrant colors of a developed photograph
I know
I know you'll want to frame me
And give me the attention you previously couldn't show
You'd make me a single shot in a continuous slideshow
But I won't like that. No
Because in my darkness
When I needed you the most
I was too inferior for you
I was nothing
And now the vivid shades of color have drawn you to me
You have invaded my darkness with your flashlight
But leave! My photograph won't develop with the rays from your light