Messy Thoughts - Chloe - Wattpad

Story cover for Messy Thoughts by thewalkingchloe

Messy Thoughts

thewalkingchloe

Reads 283
Votes 33
Parts 17
Time 17m

Reads 283
Votes 33
Parts 17
Time 17m

thewalkingchloe

Mature

cutting dark deep depression dysphoria feelings grunge harm hate help hurt life loneliness lonely love misery music rant sad self

These are just some things I wrote down to kinda describe how I'm feeling at times. Some of it is a little dark and I apologize ahead of time of I upset anybody.All Rights Reserved

cutting dark deep depression dysphoria feelings grunge harm hate help hurt life loneliness lonely love misery music rant sad self

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17 parts

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Someone New by wambuimuiruriii

"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboard

Family Comes First by CRAZY40429

Being alone? Check. Being afraid? Check. Being abused? Check times 3. Honestly, my life wasn't this bad before, not until I ended in foster care... SIKE! My life was always bad. From the moment I was born, I lived with an abusive father who blamed me for my mother's death, and even I couldn't disagree with him. Here are a few questions I am constantly asked: 'Do I do well in school?' No, are you kidding me? The only subject I'm good at is Visual Arts. 'Do I have a kind and caring family?' No, I don't think I do. 'Do I have anyone who cares about me?' No, I'm a loner and socially awkward. 'Do I have privileges?' No, if you haven't understood the message yet, I live in an abusive household. Now, you might ask if there are any questions the answer is yes. I'll give you some. 'Do I want to die?' Yes, I sometimes do. 'Do I feel alone in this world?' Yes, always. 'Do I get a beating every day?' Yes. *** This is Amara Williams, a 13 year-old with average grades and no friends. What happens when her only guardian, her dad, is dead? What happens when she finds out that she has five older brothers who are not only strict and demanding, but also protective assholes? More importantly, what happens when she finds out that she was taught lies from the moment she was born? Follow Amara as she digs deeper into her family history, uncovering the secrets and discovering the lies. ___ ⚠️ Trigger Warning ⚠️ There will be mentions of abuse, r@pe, self harm, death, and many other dark themes. I have given a warning now, and I will give a TW in each chapter when reading for safety reasons. However, I want all of my readers to know what to expect so that they can decided for themselves if they want to read. Read at your own discretion! ____ Highest Rankings: #1 in Rules: Oct. 18. 2020 #1 in Truth: Jan. 16. 2021 #1 in Alcohol: Jun. 18. 2021

Evolution by andshesmiles

There are a lot of things you don't really think about until they happen to you. Take rape, for instance. I always thought, "That won't happen to me. I have a boyfriend. I trust him. He would never take advantage of me like that..." I couldn't have been more wrong. Love in this day and age is often confused for manipulation and abuse. The warning signs are here. The things we say will tell us everything that is wrong. You are worth more than what you think you are. It's not your fault. If they tell you otherwise, get out. Burn the bridge. Always remember someone is waiting for you to walk into their life. Someone needs you. Someone loves you. Getting away from all of the wrong people and finding the right ones could save you. I can promise you right now that it saved me. These are the journal entries and selected poems from my first experience of love that left a unpleasant taste in my mouth- quite literally. I am putting this out for the whole world to see because I hope everyone will learn from my experience. People can see. We have no excuses to continue living our lives in ignorance. ...WARNING... HARMFUL THEMES INCLUDING MENTION OF SUICIDE, SELF HARM, AND RAPE. THIS HAS EXPLICIT CONTENT. RECOVERY AND AWARENESS IS THE PURPOSE OF SHARING. DO NOT READ IF THESE THEMES ARE OFFENSIVE OR HARMFUL TO YOU.

Running Screaming by Dynakitty

For 25 year old Amara Danvers, her life had gone to hell. She was stuck in an abusive relationship with a man who she loved but no longer wanted to be with. Trapped in a state far away from her family, no one to rely on. Her boyfriend's family shunned and ostracized her, looked the other way as she was repeatedly abused... Can life go on like this? What happens when everything... Even the tables change in a single night? "I don't want to live like this anymore!" "Then don't live. No one will ever love you." "Please! Stop hurting me! What did I do to deserve this?" "Ask yourself that... No one wants you. You deserve this. You'll never find anyone better." When the wheels stop spinning and everything goes dark.... "GET RID OF IT!" "STOP YOU'RE HURTING ME!" Will she have the strength to survive? To walk away? This is NOT a work of fiction. This is Real. This happened. This happened specifically to me. I am just telling my story. Names have been changed. Warning ⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️ This story depicts: Abuse Depression Trauma Recovery Unplanned Pregnancy Self Harm PTSD Mature themes Domestic Violence Please, if any of this is triggering, this is not for you. This is going to be very deep, depicting heavy trauma and I would rather you not read it if it is counterproductive to your mental health! If you are going through ANY of this, please contact your local domestic abuse hotline OR pm me and I will try to find you help.

... by monica23031

My Truth by KyimBlack

This about my life. No lies, no storytelling. The truth. If it's not something you're interested in or have the stomach to read, please don't. I haven't changed names or places. The people I write in here, myself included, will be held accountable. I'm tired of being told to sit down and shut up. Tired of people not caring or willing to help.

Poetry {Mostly Free Verse} by xXFrankenHeartXx

Just some poems I wrote mostly dark some bright all original material

Musical Hope by book-of-Charlie

This is for anyone, anyone at all, who has ever hated themselves. It is something I wish someone wrote down, so that's what I'm doing. Please don't hate yourself. You are human, and that is something to be proud of. So whenever you feel bad, please just take a look at this.

Blood Stains by no_lies

*trigger warning* I'm lost•I'm broken•I'm hurt•I'm sorry ~the ones marked "x" are about my struggle with food and eating~

The Trouble with Trust [COMPLETED] by AlleyandMisha

I'm about to tell you a story about a girl. A normal girl. A girl that had no cares in the world, until her trust for it was stripped away. When you read her story, you'll find yourself trusting her, loving her, rooting for her. But you see, not everyone gets to trust the world. Not everyone has a happy ending. --- Halfway through the kiss however, his attitude changed; instead of being a loving embrace, it became a fierce trap. His grip on her waist tightened, trapped her where she was instead of simply holding her where he wanted her. The hand in her hair grabbed a section of it, enforcing his demand for her not to go anywhere. Before she knew what was happening, he left go of her hair, and pushed her to the ground. She gasped, suddenly able to breathe. He stood up and walked over to her. He placed a soft hand on her cheek, just like he used to when he was telling her how special she was to him. None of the emotion was there this time however, all she could feel radiating from his was rage. "You shouldn't have run off, babe," he said bitterly. "I was about to show you how much I loved you. Instead, I now have to show you what happens when you anger me." --- The men regarded her, before she was shoved to the ground and one produced a whip. There, laying broken on the floor, as the other girls watched, she was whipped. Slowly, she felt her skin breaking in time with her heart and her will.

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Slide 1 of 10

Someone New cover

Family Comes First cover

Evolution cover

Running Screaming cover

Poetry {Mostly Free Verse} cover

Musical Hope cover

Blood Stains cover

The Trouble with Trust [COMPLETED] cover

Someone New

"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboard