Haunted Things - Ladies of Opportune Shenanigans - Wattpad

Story cover for Haunted Things by Wattcrastinators

Haunted Things

Wattcrastinators

Reads 352
Votes 40
Parts 7
Time 36m

Reads 352
Votes 40
Parts 7
Time 36m

Wattcrastinators

Mature

hauntedhouses humor parody random spoof vampires wattcrastinators wierd

You asked for it...or maybe you didn't. Who knows. Anyshizzle, it's a Wattcrastinator's first. A collaboration effort featuring The Wattcratinators. 

What's it about? Um...I'm going with...vampires...no, haunted houses...no, vampires. It's...haunted vampires! As for @tamoja, @krazydiamond, @LeighWStuart, and @AnnWrites, who knows. Oh, and there are also our awesome new Wattcratinators...@prose-punk @alessandra, and @kraftygal. Chime on in when you want. Or don't. Or do if you want and then forget, because there are other things...what was I doing? *scratches head Oh, yeah. 

When will we update? Who knows. Will we update? Sure...yeah. We'll update. 

Oh, by the way, it's mature all the way down here at the Wattcrastinators.All Rights Reserved

hauntedhouses humor parody random spoof vampires wattcrastinators wierd

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7 parts

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𝗦𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘀 𝗦𝗻𝗶𝗽𝗽𝗲𝘁𝘀 | 𝗍𝗁𝗋𝗂𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗋 by Katopark

[FEATURED ON WATTPAD ×13] • AMBYS Favourites 2024: Fantasy Novella ▬▬ 𝐒𝐎𝐋𝐔𝐒 𝐒𝐍𝐈𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐒 '𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧.' -𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐮𝐬 𝐙𝐮𝐬𝐚𝐤 I had met him. Taehong, I mean. Not once; not twice. But three times. As explicit meetings, of course. Each encounter so different they would seem worlds apart. Each phase bringing such a drastic change in him, I wondered whether it really was the boy I had met before. An enticing recounting of one of the most eventful things, since I had started. It's a small story, really. But don't trust me. Trusting me doesn't save you from reaching the end. Beware, I make promises I can not keep; it's my liability. And also, my strength. Because once you believe me, you might not want to cross me. ▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬ 𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒 🥇in 8 award shows 🥉in 1 award show 🏅Hyades Golden Book Featured by : @StoriesUndiscovered @WattpadDarkFantasy @WattpadShortStory @Fantasy @Fantasy(Newsletter) @WattpadUrbanFantasy @lowfantasy @SpeculativeFiction @WattpadLitFic @MysteryThrillerIN @WattpadAlternateUniverse @adventure ▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬ 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦. 𝖈𝖔𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖈𝖗𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖙𝖘 - sulkytae

How Not to Vampire - Season 1 by iamRodneyVSmith

Vampiring is HARD. Things Bob has on his checklist when he accidentally becomes a vampire: a) forget everything he knows about vampires b) Google vampire survival tactics c) don't get brutally murdered by vampires. Apparently there are vampire LAWS, and Bob, a young, romantically-challenged black man living in Toronto, never got the guidebook. Even though it's not his fault that he's broken every rule, a secret vampire society is hellbent on giving him a more permanent death. With the help of his best pal, Claude, Bob tries to stay alive and hopefully turn around his screwed-up existence in the process. This is a FREE story with Paid Exclusive Chapters. Wattys 2022 Shortlist Wattpad Stormy Nights - Winner 20 CHAPTERS only on Wattpad [[word count: 50,000-75,000 words]] EXCERPT: ****** "Look: vampires are traditionally afraid of religious symbols. It's a well-known fact. If you're any kind of vampire, you should be outta here by now, not just sitting there drinking your coffee." "I'm not actually drinking it yet. Some idiot keeps interrupting me by shoving religious symbols in my face." Claude held up an ornate brass cross with a macabre Jesus Christ in the throes of death, designed to repel any nearby vampires. "Oh look," I said dryly, "the idiot's back." ****** Edited by Debra Goelz Cover model: Ariel Pacheco Cover Photo by: Theik Smith Cover designed by: Rodney V. Smith Want more? JOIN THE DISCORD SERVER: https://discord.gg/brxdsA9 Jaime's Infinite Playlist (spotify) https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7DfPirPYtLKwEeSQ1upKZY?si=NhEhkcsIQOOpb7kKXIXWNw Book Playlist: https://music.apple.com/ca/playlist/jaimes-infinite-playlist/pl.u-JPVJCEXxXYv

15 Wattpaders, 1 Epic Book (Old Version) by BiggestCollabEver

(THIS WAS OUR OLD VERSION OF THE BOOK. PLEASE GO TO THE NEWER VERSION BECAUSE IT'S COOLER. THIS ONE'S COOL TOO.) You. Yup you. Come closer, 15 souls have something to tell you! Come take a ride into the mind of 15 mindless wattpaders. They're ordinary, but we all have our uniqueness, our special traits, don't we? Hilarious Jokes? Check. âœ” Randomness? Check. âœ” Awesomeness? Hell Yeah It's check! âœ” From quotes, rants, short stories, to basically anything and everything! @BiggestCollabEver presents their first project: 15 Wattpaders, 1 Epic Book, cause our lives weren't random already.

The Afternoon tea club: 2014 #WATTYS2014 by Jadewritesastory

The lives of group of seriously weird teenagers that just stumbled apon the amazingness of Wattpad. Sometime you may question our sanity, laugh at our retarded lives and enjoy the hilararity of the situations we seem to end up in somehow. Join in on the adventures of Jade, Shelly, Cinda, Susan, Vine, Nat, Annie and others that somehow get involved in this madness. Enjoy and have a laugh! This story is not appropraite for intoxicated walruses. © Jadewritesastory 2014

Darkened by monaxreads

The day I turned 18 was supposed to be the happiest day of my life. The beginning of my future with my mate but it all turned to hell when I was rejected. He wanted someone powerful, someone equal to him. An accessory that could help him gain power. He rejected me to choose someone more worthy of being his Luna. Couldn't bear the thought of watching him get his perfect life while I rot, I ran. 2 years later I came back better, stronger, and more powerful. I trained and fought and became the beta of the pack he needs help from. This time around I had the upper hand. Now you must be thinking this is a story where he begs for me back and somehow I forgive him. No this isn't the love story between the alpha and I, it is the love story between me and...................well you'll have to wait and see.

The Cursed House by EvaUle

---------------------------------------- It was a halloween night. Jane and her friends thought it would be fun to explore the old house at the end if the street. Nobody lives there and everybody was saying that the house is cursed. They will regret that they entered that house. ---------------------------------------- Writing in different points of view.

The Alpha Calls Me Kitten by self-absorbed

Highest Ranking: #1 in Werewolf Watty's 2015 Winner: Talk of the Town 11/23/15 "Literally the best werewolf book I've ever read." -@itsroma "*rereads 10,000,000,000 times and cries every time*" -@stilessparklez "#5thtimereader *I have to vote on all the chapters this time, that's how engrossed in the book I've become*" -@Forevertail "THIS BOOK SHALL BE IN MY LIBRARY FOREVER." -@team_breezyy ________________________________________ "What do you want?" He asked. I clapped my hands together and sighed. "To go home." His face instantly fell. He walked right into that one. "Well that sucks because you aren't going anywhere, kitten." I growled lowly at the nickname and crossed my arms. "Who says?" I argued. "I just did. Now stop acting like a brat and tell me what the hell you want to eat," he said frustrated. I rolled my eyes and turned around to exit the room. "Where the hell are you going?" He yelled at me. I stopped and turned around to look at him. "I don't want to have any food prepared by you. You're hands are probably just as dirty as your mouth. Watch your language," I stated simply and exited the kitchen. ________________________________________ © All Rights Reserved 2014

Witch Doctors Inc: SEASON ONE (Completed!) by IsabelCavesAuthor

🌟WATTYS 2023 SHORTLIST 🌟WATTYS 2023 FANS CHOICE AWARDS NOMINEE 🌟WATTYS 2022 SHORTLIST 🌟Editor's Pick (Reading Radar) Feb 2024 🌟 Featured Wattpad Pick x 4 (Wattpad HQ) 🌟 16 × Wattpad featured (Ambassador profiles) *** Welcome to Witch Doctors Inc. Got a problem? We'll solve it. Warts? Easy. Got an enemy after you? We'll find 'em. Been cursed? Have one of our glittering elixirs. Just a word of caution: there may be more here than meets the eye. Rumour has it there's a real witch around here, and her destiny has "death" written all over it. She's the last in a line of reincarnations that have all turned to evil. She'll have to battle the darkness inside her, as well as: (a) interplanetary demons (b) ancient curses that she may have cast herself (c) elusive red-eyed creatures who steal hearts Will she win the battle for her soul? Or will the First Witch's tragic story repeat itself once again? Cover by @WonderfulMiracles *FEATURED** on @Fantasy @magic @StoriesUndiscovered, @WattpadSeries, @anime, @mystery @WattpadWitches @TeenFiction @YoungAdult @WattpadMulticiltural @WattpadDarkFantasy @WattpadExplorer @Wattpad @Humor @highfantasy @Alt-u 3rd place in Okami Awards 2022, Fantasy Best First Line, Dreamies 2022 Featured on Wattpad homepage -"Tis the Season of the Witch" 2nd place in Best Fight Scene category, Jam Board Awards 2022

Let's Go For A Pint (Vampire/Humor) by Queen_Raiden

Wattys 2017 winner in The Originals category!!!! This is NOT a romance between the main character and some hunky guy. These are the adventures of vampire Lena as she lives her life from day to day alongside her human flatmate Carmen. Together they encounter human rights activists (not what you think), overly attached exes, vampire geeks, quarrelsome shapeshifters, some really chill people, and a boy band. Let's Go For A Pint is a satire/genre parody revolving around tropes associated with vampire fiction (mostly tv and film portrayals but written works may be alluded) Season 1 is up. While marked as complete, expect ongoing editing and bonus content to appear. Cover made in Canva

Murder House by XxNightStripexX

From Ouija boards to myths and scenes to make you wish you didn't come back the Murder house has it all. All of the demon games and myths that plague you in your nightmares and gorish movies come to life in one house. So why would someone live there? Where spirits roam the halls, both peaceful and evil, but when called upon only the evil come to you. When Katy and her co-workers are called out through a ouija board they are locked into the Murder house, suffering through a murderous villians plan. Split up and sent to different horror themed rooms, can they solve the challenges in time to save themselve, what about the others? What could could go wrong in a "supposed" haunted house?

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Slide 1 of 10

𝗦𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘀 𝗦𝗻𝗶𝗽𝗽𝗲𝘁𝘀 | 𝗍𝗁𝗋𝗂𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗋 cover

How Not to Vampire - Season 1 cover

15 Wattpaders, 1 Epic Book (Old Version) cover

The Afternoon tea club: 2014 #WATTYS2014 cover

The Cursed House cover

The Alpha Calls Me Kitten cover

Witch Doctors Inc: SEASON ONE (Completed!) cover

Let's Go For A Pint (Vampire/Humor) cover

Murder House cover

𝗦𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘀 𝗦𝗻𝗶𝗽𝗽𝗲𝘁𝘀 | 𝗍𝗁𝗋𝗂𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗋

[FEATURED ON WATTPAD ×13] • AMBYS Favourites 2024: Fantasy Novella ▬▬ 𝐒𝐎𝐋𝐔𝐒 𝐒𝐍𝐈𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐒 '𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧.' -𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐮𝐬 𝐙𝐮𝐬𝐚𝐤 I had met him. Taehong, I mean. Not once; not twice. But three times. As explicit meetings, of course. Each encounter so different they would seem worlds apart. Each phase bringing such a drastic change in him, I wondered whether it really was the boy I had met before. An enticing recounting of one of the most eventful things, since I had started. It's a small story, really. But don't trust me. Trusting me doesn't save you from reaching the end. Beware, I make promises I can not keep; it's my liability. And also, my strength. Because once you believe me, you might not want to cross me. ▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬ 𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒 🥇in 8 award shows 🥉in 1 award show 🏅Hyades Golden Book Featured by : @StoriesUndiscovered @WattpadDarkFantasy @WattpadShortStory @Fantasy @Fantasy(Newsletter) @WattpadUrbanFantasy @lowfantasy @SpeculativeFiction @WattpadLitFic @MysteryThrillerIN @WattpadAlternateUniverse @adventure ▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬▭▬ 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦. 𝖈𝖔𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖈𝖗𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖙𝖘 - sulkytae