Im Sorry..
- Reads 152
- Votes 0
- Parts 11
MatureOngoing<5 mins
Last published Wed, May 11, 2016
Im so sick and tired of myself..I cant do it anymore. It hurts to do anything anymore. I have EVERYTHING about myself. My body, my fat, my face, my laugh, my smile, my face. Everything. I hate it..im slowly killing myself..I hate the pain I put my best friend through..the look she gives me when she sees my cuts..its heartbreaking..I hate doing that to her..I love her more then ANYTHING in life. I love her more then life itself. I cant life without her..but I always have this deep fear the she will get sick of my bullcrap and leave me..just like everyone else did. The all day "it okay I promise I will stay by ur side and never leave u. I promise." thats all bullcrap!! They never stay!! When I open up to someone and tell then what im going through. The just shut me out and act like I was never even there..im so sick and tired of it!! Like am I that horrible to be around!?
But forget it..faking a smile can hide so much..im so sorry for being me...so worthless..
All Rights Reserved
Join the largest storytelling communityGet personalized story recommendations, save your favourites to your library, and comment and vote to grow your community.
You may also like
Regret <3 (1)
[editing] "W-what?" I spit out even though I understand very clearly. I've been lied too. By my best friend or so I thought. I start crying right on the spot ruining every drop of makeup I have on. "You heard me." She hisses every word dripping with venom as I cry. She watches heartlessly while her friend of 15 years breaks down in front of her. Why am I still calling her a friend?! Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. I'm definitely ugly crying but I don't care. I look up slowly and she is recording me. I look down really fast to hide my face. "There you have it people. ALL 1000 OF YOU!! I have officially broke the bitch!" She shouts happily as she moves the camera around me. I stop crying. "What did you just call me?" I ask slowly showing every bit of anger in my voice. She trips up as I stand up. I scoff as she stutters - "I-I...I mean..." she loses every little drop of confidence as I stare into her fake pink contacts. Want to find out what's happening?? Continue reading!!Complete
The Voices.
I never thought I'd actually do this.... I've thought about it but never actually gone through with it.... The voice in my head has been screaming at me for years... But I never actually tried to do... This... It's hard to be around people when you have someone telling you to tear their throats out with your teeth... But it's worse when you're alone. She tells me to do terrible things to myself... Tells me I'm worthless... Unloved....Expendable... Of course I believe her. She's in my head for Christ's sakes how can I not believe her. It's so hard...I gave in...I had no choice...the temptation is so strong. I can't hug people without wondering what it would feel like to thrust a knife into their back and feel their bodies jerk in surprise as they slowly began to realize...that they're dying.....they're being murdered...and not by a complete stanger...but by a person that they love....that they thought they could trust....oh god I want to...give in..... I can't believe my life is like this. Why me? How could I do such a horrible thing? Why....Complete
My Unrequired Crush
He's cold, insensitive and rude... But why can't I stay away? ******************** My love life was the last of my problems. Last year, bullies, penny less... Senior year didn't present itself exactly as a dream. And everything gets even worst when my ex-bestfriend came back; the only person I'd ever loved until he decided my friendship wasn't enough as and turned against me. Now I have a different group, a clear aim and things won't be the same they were, right? And to confuse me all the more there's Connor.Complete
MINE
Things changed. It happened slow....Then, it suddenly picked up. It took on a life of it's own. SHIT! The weaker are on top. They seem to have it all. I have become the last thing, I ever wanted. Nothing should be bought or sold. There should never be a price on existing. I'm way too old for this shit....What ever the hell this is meant to be! Will this work out? Or will I just kill her. But. I like her smile. Maybe....We'll take it from there.Complete
Save Me
I feel his dirty hands touch me once more and move up higher to my thighs. I try to jerk them away but he locks my arms in his hand above my head as a thousand hot tears leave my eyes. No...no...please... I shut my eyes, not wanting to see this face another time. I shudder in disgust as he brings his lips to my neck and starts kissing me. Suddenly, I hear a groan of pain and I get free of his disgusting hands. I don't feel him on me but I don't dare to open my eyes. Another moan is heard again and a punch. I open my eyes and see him kneeling and bleeding. I watch at the boy who saved me and he hits him hard as more blood floods from his lips and nose. It's so dark and my tears don't allow me to see my angel. My savior moves as his fist connects with his face and my angel's hair glow under the moonlight and I stop breathing. Corbyn? The boy falls to the ground unconscious as Corbyn hits him in the jaw for the tenth time. His eyes move to my glossy ones and without any thought, he comes to me and wraps his arms around my body tightly. And just like that, I start crying harder as I bury my head in his neck and tug hard in this shirt. He doesn't say a word, he just pulls me closer to him and leaves me to surrender to this cathartic cry that overwhelms me. My brain stops working and the only word that exists is 'save'. I open my mouth and after so many weeks, the first words that slip my lips between cries and sobs are "You...you saved me" ----- Amelia is a young girl with a simple life and plans for her bright future. After her parent's death, everything she thought she knew will alter. But actually, all that is about to change when a blonde annoying boy will come into her life and break everything she believed into pieces. And who knows even save her and himself...Complete
Unmask
"You trust me, don't you?" he says with a smile, that smile. It had fooled everyone, even me at some point, and for the first time I want to scream with rage and shake the earth to the core. "Give me a hug," he says pulling me out of the chair that feels like a rock underneath me. I am as stiff as a board as his hands circle me, making me feel worse than dirt. His hands reach between my thighs and I want to plunge a knife deep through his chest. The only thing stopping me is, the knife is no where near. I pull back and I don't try to hide the anger in my eyes. I want him to see it. To know that I am coming for him. Rape is chanted repeatedly in my mind, reminding of the lies I just told and the false accusations I am throwing on innocent people. He's probably figured it out anyways, surely a Priest as high as he cannot be deceived. But none of that matters anymore because...... This is just the Beginning.Complete
Outlander ✔️
Everything changed now. I never expected to wake up, but I did. I woke up barely feeling alive with only one thought in my mind. Liam. It was always him. It was always going to be him. I spend so long denying all those feelings that I don't want to anymore. But he woke up with no memory of his feelings for me. Only the hatred he so clearly sees and feels. I struggle to make him remember when his hatred only grows each day he continues to spend with me. It was impossible to remind him when he only ever seen me survive as an Outcast, an Outsider, an Outlander... **This is the final book in the Out series. I highly suggest you read the first two books Outcast and Outsider, so you're not confused with character, events and places**Complete
Curvaceous Not Fat
Not many take pride in their weight, but I do. I'm a size sixteen, 44DD, and an ass most wish they had. I'm beautiful with long, dark hair flowing down my back. My tits doesn't sag, my ass doesn't sag and I have clear skin. What would I have to feel bad about? Don't get me wrong at one point I did feel bad. Wouldn't you if you were constantly called fat? Thanks to six of the best friends you could ask for I know what to say when people call me fat. "Hey Allison, you fat ass." Says Cynthia as she walks past me laughing with her clones right alongside if her. I turn and glare at her. "Hey Cynthia, I'm curvaceous not fat. Get it right." The silence is golden. I smile as I stuff the rest of my stuff into my locker and walk to homeroom to meet with my friends. *Characters: Allision Ja'hara Dave Austin Justin Brad Ashton* Have you ever felt like you didn't belong? What can you do when it seems like everyone hates you? How do you take being redicule? You turn the negatives into positives. So what you can't wear the sizes 0-5. Let them have it. Embrace the skin you in. Baby you're curvaceous, not fat. Never forget that. Most of the time people can change, but not everyone. Some will always think they're better then rest. No matter how big or how small someone is, words can be hurtful. No one can change overnight. One day you might be the bully and the next you are the victim. Be careful what you do and say because karma will get you, and it will hurt.Complete
I Fell in Love with a Bad Boy
CRINGE WARNING! First book I ever wrote on here!! -- "Sometimes the person who you are willing to take a bullet for is the person behind the gun." I stood peering over the cold lifeless body that lay before my eyes. I had always thought of death the enemy, but right now, I blessed it upon the person who is now at peace. Sometimes you don't need to be the smartest, or the fastest, but you do need to be wisest. They say the blood runs deeper than water, and I believe it, because even though the people that we love can turn on us and begin to hate us, they are only human, meaning that soon they will begin to see how short life really is and how it is not to be wasted. People who seem perfect and they look like they have no floors'; they are the people who are suffering, like I was. But I found my savior in the most uncommon place. He was able to look through my mask, he saw the cracks, and tried to fix the broken girl that hid away deep inside the girl who only wanted to be seen as 'fine'. I slowly began to find comfort and safety in him, and I did the same to him. We were two broken people becoming whole. Someone once said when you pass, if you can count your true friends on one hand you are beyond lucky, and I even though I did not like the person that lay before me, I know that he once had true friends, including me. I'm a 17 year old girl who has suffered more than any other, beginning to believe that 'Hope' was just another word the people throw around. Until I fell in love with a badboy. Trailer to the side -------------------> Made By @Laura__1 Cover made by @Beautiful_Tragedy8 Copyright 2014Complete
Outcast ✔️
"You're hurting me..." I whispered. But his grip only got tighter as the pain got even more crucial. "It's what you get for stopping the party yesterday," Liam said. "I needed to," I murmured under my breath in the hopes that he would hear the weakness in my voice and let me go. But at last, it was only hoped that made me think that way. He didn't let go; he wouldn't let go until he taught a firm lesson. No matter how many times I ask and plead for forgiveness, he is never going to go until he is satisfied. "Were you jealous that you weren't invited? Is that why you had to sabotage the whole thing, uh?" he bit his teeth, his voice getting angrier and his hold on me crushing. "Ow.. please...," I said tears rolling down my eyes. He didn't say anything this time just watched me cry, and I could basically see the smirk forming on his lips in slow motion. This is what he wanted for me as if it was never enough for him to see me like this. I waited for him to say something anything, but instead, he let me go aggressively and pushing past me hard, causing me to lose balance and fall to the marble floor. I looked up to see everyone watching me struggle to get up. No one came to help, and I didn't expect them to they watched and laughed and even filmed, but no one came to my rescue. - The fake smiles, laughter, friends I am getting sick of it all. I always felt like I didn't belong anywhere with him gone. It was even worse. It was pathetic that I thought it's okay I will get through this, but I am slipping away falling slowly. The only reason I am still holding on is for my family. But he hurts me, bullies me, breaks me in ways I can't even describe. He has become the worst nightmare, and I can't wake up from it. There is no helping me from his sick and twisted games. After all, he believes I was the reason for the death of his best friend. But I have to hold on only one more year till I don't have to see him anymore. I need to survive as an outcast...Complete
[editing] "W-what?" I spit out even though I understand very clearly. I've been lied too. By my best friend or so I thought. I start crying right on the spot ruining every drop of makeup I have on. "You heard me." She hisses every word dripping with venom as I cry. She watches heartlessly while her friend of 15 years breaks down in front of her. Why am I still calling her a friend?! Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. I'm definitely ugly crying but I don't care. I look up slowly and she is recording me. I look down really fast to hide my face. "There you have it people. ALL 1000 OF YOU!! I have officially broke the bitch!" She shouts happily as she moves the camera around me. I stop crying. "What did you just call me?" I ask slowly showing every bit of anger in my voice. She trips up as I stand up. I scoff as she stutters - "I-I...I mean..." she loses every little drop of confidence as I stare into her fake pink contacts. Want to find out what's happening?? Continue reading!!
More detailsContent Guidelines