Story cover for The Heart of an Ace by snowlikedolphin
The Heart of an Ace
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  • WpView
    Reads 26
  • WpVote
    Votes 4
  • WpPart
    Parts 4
Ongoing, First published May 21, 2016
I'm breathing heavily, 

My body's numb, I'm about to collapse
My feet, my arms...

I need water, I'm thirsty...


I tilted my head and saw my team panting heavily, were a point away with the scoring. 

but it's the oponent's match point
Everybody's tired, but....

'prrttt.' 
They served, 

'I got this!' our libero shouted,
she got the ball,

"Isaaa!" i called to our setter as I clapped my hands, she knows what to do, she released a good set, that is a little far away from the net, 

I don't care if I'm tired,
I will SCORE,

*paaaak! My final spike
.
.
.
I landed on the floor, hoping the ball got through, 

'prrrtttt.

I suppposed to stand straight but a hug from my back stopped me, and I felt my jersey getting wet, is she crying?..

 then I heard

"you did great, it was a nice game, but we were not enough"

I bowed in dismay, I failed, we did not win,

so this is it, My last year in high school as a Volleyball player ends right here, right now, it sucks,

"If only, I trained harder"
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What we have is just now. As long as she loves me. As long as she wants to be with me. As long as there is 'we'. I love her! But the rainbow is not just a blend of vibrant and bright colors. It doesn't even stay for a long period of time-- just enough for us to see and in a fleet of time is gone, leaving us wondering if it's real. A rainbow doesn't have black and white. It wasn't just like that. Same as love. Same as us. There were times that i want to give her up. Not because my love did fade, rather, my love is too much. Too much that letting her go is the only option left for her to choose me without hesitation, without guilt, freed of lies. I want her to grow, to weigh things as it is. I want her to make me feel that being with me is her choice. I want her to realize that i am hers and that she have to surrender herself to me as well. I want her to love me because that is the way she feels and not because it was the safest way. Being with her is paradise. It was a mixture of colored pastel. It was too vibrant to explain. But at a sudden twist of downs and ups, we are shaking. Loving her has become my weakness. The weakening thought of losing her when I fuck up is too much to run me insane. I'm overreacting perhaps. But being with her, means walking in a narrow-road of heaven. There's no security, no assurance. One wrong move, and I'll be slipping away. Just in the never ending pain of darkness, of solitude, of self-struggle. Loving her has become my addiction. I couldn't get enough of it. But so they say, what's too much can cause harm. Maybe I'm loving her too much that she finds it hard to breathe when i'm around. But yes, it is just a wishful thinking; things that I'll surely not going to say to her because i will never ever earn the courage to say so. We are just nothing but a 'fateful coincidence.'
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Letting go of someone I love for the sake of her happiness with someone else is a pain that cuts deep into the soul. It's a constant ache that never seems to go away, a reminder of what could have been, but never was. Shaniel and her love were never mine. Watching the person I love more than anything walk away from me and into the arms of another is a pain that can only be described as a gut-wrenching agony. It's a feeling of emptiness and despair that suffocates me, leaving me feeling lost and alone in a world that suddenly seems so cold and unforgiving. Every moment feels like a struggle, every memory a painful reminder of what was lost. I tried to move on, to find happiness in other things, but nothing seems to fill the void that was left behind. In the end, all I can do is accept the reality of the situation and let go, even though it feels like tearing a piece of my heart out. I'm broken but it's okay. She can always break me all she wants. I am hers and my heart is with her anyway. But then the coldness around me was swept away by the warmth that embraced all of me. She pulled me in. "Hug me back, Drex," she softly plead. No, Laya... I can't cage you with me. Started: December 20, 2024 Finished: November 19, 2015 Published: Status: COMPLETED Follow me on my socials for more updates. IG: smnthawsm Twitter: awsmbi FB: Samantha Claire Lim Radaza | awsmbi E-mail: claire.radaza02@gmail.com