words that are meant to be said

Its funny. When your only desire is to be loved by the people who are supposed to wipe your tears, tend your cuts and bruises, tell you what's wrong from right. In the end you only get hurt by just watching them, when you try your best to be the perfect person in the whole world. They turn and look away. So we throw ourselves into things to keep our minds hopeless thoughts away, and turn everything down so others don't see your pain and tears. You hide the cuts and lie underneath, but all you ever wanted was to find something or someone to help with the burdens of your mind.
When your tongue is twisted and can't find the words because your scared that if you say to much they'll run, so you try to be someone you're not, then you're not happy. When you try and try over again to be that happy bubbly person it just comes out wrong and people just walk away, then you fall into a deep well of sorrow that you can't climb out of. When you contemplate your own existence because you try to cry out and no one hears.
Your past creeps up and swallows you, and you try and try to breathe but you can't. When you can't even find the words to yell because you don't want people to notice, notice you or the pain your hiding. People call you weird fat or anorexic and label you these things until one day someone notices, notices you have a beautiful smile, notices that you are more caring and considerate than anyone in the world. Then slowly you let your guard down but not too much afraid they'll run.