Always Be My Light

You know its funny .. I hate the man who is married to my mom. I hate the fact that i was born to experience the emotions i hate .. I hate everything... They all think that i'm nice and all.. They all think that i'm always happy or jolly but i'm not.. I hate feeling lonely ,i tried ignoring those feeling of loneliness and i cant, if i feel in me that i lost them already.. I tried everyday to ease myself that things are normal,that i tried to do other things just to forget .. But at the end of the day i always end up on being alone. Why cant i be happy? I missed the times when i was young .. When things are not like this .. I want to go with the flow with life but i cant cause i myself cant move on . but how could i move on if things i say is nothing to them.. Could i welcome death ? Cause i feel like dying everyday.. I don't like to pretend anymore. I'm tired . so tired ..

Can someone save me from this misery?