Metanoia
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- Parts 2
Ongoing9m
Last published Thu, Mar 16, 2017
"You know what? Your a victim of yourself. There I said it a victim of yourself no one to blame but yourself" Mason screamed he took another step closer. Now his body was pushed up against mine. I could feel his heart beat against his chest, he sighed and looked down at me with apologetic eyes.
"U think it's easy feeling empty?" I asked Finally looking up into his hazel eyes, "It's exhausting to feel everything and nothing at the same time you know that?"
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#17
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...there is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable. " Kharis, why don't you just tell me how you feel because how you act is confusing me. " I said fed up with the uncertainty of our situation. " Is there something here or am I just making a fool of myself?" I scoffed. Having said that out loud, a cloud of embarrassment built over me. Of course there was nothing between us, he wasn't capable of looking at me as anything other than an intruder to his perfect little family. He just needed a shoulder to cry on and a heart to play games with and like the fool I am, I served it up to him on a silver platter. This was nothing but a way for him to deal with the whole Kalen situation. I was just a distraction. He remained completely silent and that was a good enough answer for me. I should have crushed this stupid crush years ago. I should have never let him get this close. " Okay, " I said softly. " I get it, I was just a distraction, a way to deal with what's happening." I had to fight real hard to fight back the tears that were just begging to be let free. He doesn't deserve them, no one does!. " I should have known! " I said feeling like an utter fool. I attempted to push past him but before I could he stepped in front of me and looked me dead in the eyes. Shit, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned Kalen. He kept his eye contact as he slowly got to his knees. He's eyes were watery at this point and the guilt of mentioning Kalen was beginning to eat me up. Shit, shit! " I'm sorry, I shouldn't have..." I said getting to my knees as well. " I don't know how you've been able to over look all the shit I put you through over the years." He said with such a low tone, i don't think he was talking to me. He immediately looked away probably ashamed of himself. " I'm blackened at the heart by all the pain I caused you, so don't apologize I'm only getting what I deserve.
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