Jokes - marshallmundy - Wattpad

Jokes

Reads 7
Votes 0
Parts 1
Time <5 mins

Reads 7
Votes 0
Parts 1
Time <5 mins

Mature

What dose a bee sit on ... its behind 
We're does a couch sit ...no were you sit on it
Why did the hand bring $5 across the road to get to the 2nd hand storeAll Rights Reserved

Table of contents

jakes
Sat, Jul 2, 2016

1 part

jakes
Sat, Jul 2, 2016

Sign up to add Jokes to your library and receive updates

or

Content Guidelines

You may also like

Stiletto Sisterhood by FallonDeMornay

Stiletto Sisterhood is now published by W by Wattpad Books, available in paperback and E-book! As a Wattpad reader, you can also access the Wattpad Published Edition here upon purchase, or read the Wattpad Original Edition for free. ***** When they first met, best friends Priya, Isobel, Caitlin, Eshe, and Shayne swore a vow: Chase dreams not drama. Now, years later . . . ***** Priya Seth is determined to win the coveted one-year mentorship with her idol at New York's hottest law firm. Her rival? Last night's hookup, Hadrian Marek. Despite having a privileged upper hand, Hadrian is willing to form an alliance. Priya's only condition? No sex. Isobel Morgan is planning the perfect wedding, fighting to get the promotion she deserves, and caring for her dependent father. But when a video of her cheating fiancé goes viral, her world comes crashing down until she gets an offer that merges her passion for news and activism. The caveat? Long hours and travel away from her father. As these young women discover that achieving dreams is often erratic, and drama is as inevitable as adulting, the foundation of their friendship begins to crack, putting their sisterhood to the test [word count: 90,000-100,000 words]

The Heartbroken Heartbreaker by SamMadison

A painful breakup pushes Kyla Evans to get into a fake relationship with the person her ex-boyfriend hates the most: Seth Everett. But what will she do when the game starts to feel too real? ***** Seventeen-year-old Kyla has sworn off love. After getting dumped all too suddenly by her longtime boyfriend Cedric, she becomes convinced that people are never really who you think they are. So when notorious playboy Seth Everett suggests that Kyla fake date him to get back at Cedric, it seems like the perfect plan... as long as she doesn't end up falling for him. Content and/or trigger warning: This story mentions cancer, which may be triggering for some readers. [[word count: 150,000-200,000 words]]

All Good Things by Renee_RK

"Bridget Jones with a lot more wine! This story is hilarious, feel-good and relatable in all the best ways!" - Grace K @ HQ. She's just quit her high-flying job and her marriage is coasting on fumes. Can Alice find a sense of purpose in all the madness? ***** Alice's life isn't going to plan. She's tied to her phone, pointlessly managing PR for a sinking corporate megalith. She's become a bit player in her kids' lives and her marriage is coasting on fumes. Forcing herself into action with a rash resignation, Alice sets out to make a positive impact on the world around her. But how? Meditation leads to napping and her attempts to get closer to her teenage daughter result in the discovery of a secret that left her at loss of what to do! As the months tick by and a sense of purpose continues to elude her, Alice finds herself forming bonds with the most unlikely characters: the young woman who panhandles outside her old office; the homeless boy who sits cross-legged outside the liquor store with his ginger cat; her own dog walker who, it turns out, knows a thing or two about developing a good crema. Testing the limits of marriage, motherhood and the Toronto subway system--can Alice find her way into a purpose-driven life? Or will it all be one giant hangover? [*Wattpad Editor's Pick 2018*] [[word count: 70,000-80,000 words]] Readers say: "This had me laughing so loud that my sister came to check up on me to see if I'm OK!!!" "...the new Bridget Jones, a working woman's take on the digital age." About the Author: Working mother, annoying vegetarian and red wine enthusiast, Renee lives in Toronto with her flawed but wonderful family (seriously, who left socks on the kitchen counter?) in a flawed but wonderful house (what *is* that smell in the basement?).

Second Chances by BlueEyedSwede

After Noah destroyed Emelie's heart, she spiraled into a deep depression. When he reappears years later with a very different version, she must decide if he's worth a second chance. ***** Emelie and Noah were high school sweethearts, but they were forced apart when Emile's father got a new job, and the family moved away. Years later, after a chance encounter, sparks fly once again and the two rekindle their romance. But as they've grown up, their lives have become more complicated, and unwelcomed outside forces try to keep them apart. Still, the pull that they feel is inescapable. Is it worth it to give their love another chance? Content warning: This story contains mature sexual content and themes of sexual assault, sexual harassment and depression. Cover designed by Ren T

DARK MOON: THE BLOOD ALTAR by HYBE_STORIES

Riverfield, a beautiful town by the ocean, is home to the prestigious Decelis Academy. It's also home to seven boys with a secret: they may simply seem like players of the famous sport, Nightball, but they're actually vampires. To escape from their dark past, they try to lead normal lives as students - other than the occasional hitch since their rival Nightball team happens to be made up of werewolves. But in the end, these seven friends always find strength in each other. Until one day, a new transfer student with curious strength causes the boys' forgotten past to slowly unravel. DARK MOON: THE BLOOD ALTAR with ENHYPEN ***** Original story: HYBE Co-planning: HYBE / NAVER WEBTOON

The Heir and the General by druidrose

Forced into an engagement with a man she doesn't love, Reyna must ignore her bond with her father's general in order to avoid a war and save her throne. ***** As the first female heir to one of the great Northern Kingdoms, Reyna panics when her claim to the throne is threatened by the discovery that her father's general is her soulbound partner. She forces herself to ignore their connection, determined to be more than a general's wife, only for her father to manipulate her into a political engagement with a man she could never love. So to forge her own path forward, keep her throne, and confront her feelings for the general who owns her heart, Reyna must find a way to refuse this arranged marriage without destroying her kingdom in the process. [[word count: 100,000-150,000 words]] ---------- Cover designed by Ren Tachibana

The Devil's Match by therealestpotato

Lily is a laidback slacker with a phobia for commitment...who happens to owe the devil her (nonexistent) firstborn. When the ruler of Hell comes knocking, what choice does she have but to let the devil play matchmaker? *** Lily has never been good at relationships, not that it matters to her. That is until Eve, a seductive woman claiming to be the devil's apprentice, shows up to collect a debt Lily doesn't remember owing: her firstborn child. Without a firstborn to give, and with the threat of eternal damnation at her heels, Lily finds herself on a chaotic matchmaking quest with the devil herself. Eve swears she's only playing matchmaker to collect the debt owed to her, but with each failed set-up, Lily suspects there may be something more to the devil's plan. [[word count: 60,000 - 70,000]] Cover designed by Joe Resch [[Wattys 2020 Winner]] Content warning: this story includes dark humour, mature themes, and scenes of violence and gore

The Many Dates of Indigo by AmethystAmber87

The Many Dates of Indigo is now published as a Paperback, and E-book with W by Wattpad Books! As a Wattpad reader, you can access both the Wattpad Original Edition and Wattpad Books Published Edition here upon purchase. Thank you so much for your support! ***** As Indigo Clark nears her 30th birthday, new male suitors vie for her attention. The trick is to pick the right one... ***** Indigo Clark, a successful businesswoman approaching her 30th birthday can't seem to shake the questions, "Where's your ring?", "When will you get married?", "Are you going to have children?" Tired of the nosiness and the pressure, Indigo sets out to experiment in her dating life. What an adventure she's in for! You have Tate, her gorgeous and loyal best friend, who she has a past with...but they don't talk about it. Then there's Nathan. He seems perfect on paper but is hiding a serious part of his life from her. Owen is a dashing gentleman until he isn't. And Diego, oh Diego, he's a hotshot lawyer used to getting what he wants but Indigo also knows what she wants and isn't going to let him off the hook easily. She is fierce and smart, and yes, it's raining men but Indigo isn't afraid to hold an umbrella... [Highest Ranking: #8 in ChickLit] (Featured) [ Winner of the Genre Awards for ChickLit *First Book* ] [[word count: 90,000-100,000 words]] Cover designed by Eva I (@evadrawssometimes)

Brew Books 2 by ellekirks

After a difficult first few months working in the Brew Books café, Jane is finally feeling at home - until the past comes back to haunt her. ***** After months of working at the café and bookstore, Jane has finally started to grow into her independence and stop viewing her self-worth in Instagram likes. But suddenly Harper, the cute bartender Jane feels a spark with, seems to have eyes for someone else. Kitty unleashes a secret from Jane's past that she's not sure she'll be able to get past. And the lingering affects of Matt's absence in the bookstore create a conflict which threatens to tear the entire crew - and business - apart. (Book 2 in the Brew Books series) [[word count: 70,000-80,000 words]]

The Entangled Engagement of Indigo by AmethystAmber87

Our beloved Indigo is engaged to the love of her life, or is she? When a man she just can't shake off walks back into her life, Indigo has to make a tough decision: to follow what she knows to be right or listen to her heart. But only time will tell who she'll walk down the aisle with. This is the sequel to The Many Dates of Indigo, also a Paid Story. ***** Three hundred and sixty-five days changes many things. Indigo Clark is deep in wedding planning, but she soon learns that deciding the right colour scheme or picking the perfect bouquet won't be her only problem. She is determined to walk down the aisle, but she can't help the nagging feeling that she's making a mistake, especially when a blast from the past makes an appearance two weeks before her wedding! Indigo has always wanted love, marriage and motherhood, but now that it's at her fingertips, she isn't too sure if she's picked the right one. [Highest Ranking: #19 in ChickLit] [[word count: 40,000-50,000 words]] Cover designed by Eva Ismail

You may also like

Slide 1 of 10

Stiletto Sisterhood cover

The Heartbroken Heartbreaker cover

All Good Things cover

Second Chances cover

DARK MOON: THE BLOOD ALTAR cover

The Heir and the General cover

The Devil's Match cover

The Many Dates of Indigo cover

Brew Books 2 cover

The Entangled Engagement of Indigo cover

Stiletto Sisterhood

Stiletto Sisterhood is now published by W by Wattpad Books, available in paperback and E-book! As a Wattpad reader, you can also access the Wattpad Published Edition here upon purchase, or read the Wattpad Original Edition for free. * When they first met, best friends Priya, Isobel, Caitlin, Eshe, and Shayne swore a vow: Chase dreams not drama. Now, years later . . . * Priya Seth is determined to win the coveted one-year mentorship with her idol at New York's hottest law firm. Her rival? Last night's hookup, Hadrian Marek. Despite having a privileged upper hand, Hadrian is willing to form an alliance. Priya's only condition? No sex. Isobel Morgan is planning the perfect wedding, fighting to get the promotion she deserves, and caring for her dependent father. But when a video of her cheating fiancé goes viral, her world comes crashing down until she gets an offer that merges her passion for news and activism. The caveat? Long hours and travel away from her father. As these young women discover that achieving dreams is often erratic, and drama is as inevitable as adulting, the foundation of their friendship begins to crack, putting their sisterhood to the test [word count: 90,000-100,000 words]