I'm Better Than Him
- Reads 44
- Votes 4
- Parts 2
Ongoing7m
Last published Wed, Feb 1, 2017
I feel so jealous watching them.
I knew what was going to happen tomorrow. So why didn't I interrupt them? Why didn't I stop the hurt I saw in the very near future?
Jealousy and guilt.
Let me start my story from the beginning though. This is a trip of my life, I'll never be able to forget.
I watched her the first day and the four other ones after that. It wasn't even a week with her, that's how long it took. She's shy and sensitive, jumping to be a part of others, yet reclusive, scared. At first I was just curious as were the others. We all watched her. All we knew was that she was an outsider. I mean we've all seen her at church, rarely. At least once for every summer or holiday.
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" hey " I said while giving a light knock to the door " hi, what are u doing here? come in " he said trying to fix his tie, which he seemed to fail miserably. " shouldn't u be getting ready for the wedding? " he said. He was right, I should be getting ready wearing the white gown selected by my cousin and getting my hair and makeup done. But here I was wearing all black standing in front of him. The wedding is to be held within a few hours, everything was planned according to me, the pinkish white and red wine coloured decorations, the food , the cake, everything. This wedding is exactly as I expected my wedding to be. " ughhh God, Anne can you please help me with the tie? " he said giving up trying to do his tie. He was wearing the black wedding tuxedo which looked as if it was made only for him, his hair combed and parted on the left side giving him the perfect look. " no " I said sternly " no? " he said finally looking up at me connecting our eyes. Slowly I walked closer to him and then did the one thing that I wanted to do for so many years, I closed the distance between us and pressed my lips onto his, the kiss lasted for a few second before I pulled out, but stood very close to him. He didn't kiss me back maybe because he was too shocked to or because he just didn't want to. I started doing his tie, not looking up at him. I felt him staring down at me " this is the last time I am doing something for u Kai " I said as I walked out of his room and apparently his life, not daring to look back. Tears started to slip out of my eyes. I can't do this, not now, not ever. People gave me a questioning look as I walked up to the gate. Not being able to bare it anymore I started running towards my car as tears continued to slip out of my eyes. And right at that moment I decided to do the one thing that I thought would be the best for all of us I WALKED OUT OF THE ONE PERSON'S LIFE WHOM I LOVE THE MOSTComplete
"You forgot? Right?" I asked, more like whispery. I am really trying my best not to ask, but it suddenly came out without me realizing it. "It's our 100th day today, Bae." I don't intend on looking back up where she is, since I don't want to expect more, to see the reaction and was really trying my best to avoid her gaze. She didn't respond, She must've been so surprise. So, from that, I straightly and directly looked up and see what she's up to. Unfortunately, it was a wrong move. I saw it. I saw how her reaction change. From a relax one to a surprise one. You see, eyes can't lie. "N- No. No. It's just that- - - - " "It's okay." I tried to sound okay. I even smiled to assure her. But, you can't just feel okay, when you know, at any minute my tears might fall. When she did not respond, I kept quiet and continued eating. It's tiring when you know, you put effort to all this and yet you can feel from that person was the opposite expressions of what you expected. Expectations really isn't good at all. "Are you okay?" She was about to touch me but my body acted on its own, I move backward. Seeing her this close and that pity look in her eyes makes my heart breaks and offended even more. "We don't really talk now, why are you curious now?" I can't help myself but answer in sarcasm. This setting is really tiring and obviously new to me. I can't recognize and get a hold of myself, and any moment now I might burst out, right now, right here. I don't even really care now if the camera is actually recording us. I felt the need to go somewhere. I need space to breathe. I need to walk away from her now because I know when it hurts , I can't control my feelings let alone my stupid self. "Excuse me! I need to use the restroom." She nodded without tearing her eyes off me. And, that's my que to walk away. No turning back this time. It may look disrespectful but I can't pretend that everything is okay and it doesn't hurts me at all.
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