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Lonely Cities

mylifeisphantastic

Reads 78
Votes 3
Parts 2
Time 19m

Reads 78
Votes 3
Parts 2
Time 19m

mylifeisphantastic

amazingphil angst danandphil danhowell danisnotonfire fanfiction phanfiction phillester

Once you've been disowned, kicked out, left for dead with everything you've ever valued stripped from your life you've pretty much reached rock bottom. And when you're at this lowest of lows every breath in itself is a struggle, survival is only a distant hope on the horizon. When you're this far gone is there anything, anyone that can save you? Any way to make any of it just a little better? Can anyone help you feel just a little less alone when every night you're crying yourself to sleep on the city streets? 




TWs: Suicidal thoughts/attempts, use of drugs/alcohol, disowning/abandonment.All Rights Reserved

amazingphil angst danandphil danhowell danisnotonfire fanfiction phanfiction phillester

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I love you by emmenim

I love you so much. WARNING: SMUT

Life Is Precious, Just Like Him - Phil Lester X Depressed! Reader by noathenerd

You met Dan in College and became close friends, even dropped out at the same time as him because of overwhelming stress, and your Depression and Anxiety. Your parents won't take you back in because they're abusive and always have been, so you have no where to go. That is until Dan saves you and takes you in. At his place you met Phil and instantly there's something about him that makes you fall in love. Phil and you bond immediately and he promises to help you through your depression and other problems, no matter how hard it may be.

I Am Nobody (phan) by MySecretsX

COMPLETE *** I am nobody and I'm nobody that matters. I'm alone, neglected by everyone and worthless. I want something, something crazy, something that's dangerous to get. But I will. Most would call me a psycho, but that's far from it. I'm so hurt and so full of emotion, which is exactly the reason I've decided to do this. Do what exactly? Stalk him 'til he loves me. I'm reasonably popular, I wouldn't say famous, on the internet. I have my little community and as long as I'm making someone happy, even myself, making these videos is worth it. There's this one guy, though, that's constantly trying to get my attention, and succeeding for that matter. I've been warned he's dangerous and I should take the hints and stay away, but I've never been one to listen. And, I see something in this kid, he's hurt, and I will help him. With what exactly? Whatever he wants.

im saved, finally [an "adopted by" phan ff] by -aesthethicc

(old description) ---trigger warning please stay safe--- "Hey Ugly!" I heard Piper yell to me "Still daydreaming about those Dan and Phil dorks ever adopting you. Let's face it, if no regular person likes nor will adopt you, why will those fags ever will" I flashed out of my daydream from the sound of other teens laughing at what seemed to be me. I ran upstairs to get my blade "She's right...no one's ever gonna adopt me. Definitely not Dan and Phil. No one even likes me... No one even cares about me... no one" I think to myself just before I hit a vein. (much newer one) no one likes riley she thinks why should they everyone loves dan and phil so whyd they choose her? →{tw: sexual content, profanity, darkness (depression and such), descriptive language, and even a little bit of gore is involved greatly} ***FIRST FAN FICTION-- CRINGY*** ******also, i wrote the majority of this fan fiction in 6th grade except the last 3 or 4 chapters to wrap up the book but its quite poorly written in my opinion but a lot of people seem to still read it so to each their own (^:

struggling➾ phan (complete) by -aesthetichowell-

update:: this was written about two years ago, the writing is quite bad, I apologize in advance //trigger warning// //dans pov// "do you love me phil ?" "maybe i do"

anathema ; phan by rosespjm

{edited} "won't you go to someone else's sleep? won't you go to someone else's head? haven't you taken enough from me? won't you torture someone else's sleep?" TW : depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, actual suicide attempt. read at your own risk.

Depression//Phan by bluetroyee

(tw: s*lf-h*rm, mentions of s*lf-h*rm, d*pr*ss*d scenes. May be triggering for some. Read at your own limit, please!) Phil Lester, a boy who's falling into depression slowly. And soon, his depression may end up falling to deep. He gets hateful and rude comments on his videos that he posts to YouTube. He even gets hate on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr. What did he ever do to them? What did he do to deserve any of this?? His flatmate Dan doesn't know about Phil's depression, however. All he knows (thinks, rather) is that his best friend is staying strong through all of the hateful things he gets from people. But in reality, that's not what Phil is doing at all. He's not staying strong through the hate. He's just faking the smile for Dan so he wouldn't get so worried about him. Sure, Dan might be able to crack some real smiles out of him once in a while, but not every time. He also wears long sleeves and thick bracelets to hide the scars of his pain. He acts like his normal quirky, adorable, funny, weird self when making YouTube videos, when around his friends and family, when having a meet-up with fans (or just being around them in general), when out in public, etc. Phil hadn't told anyone at all about his depression. And he probably wouldn't anytime soon, either. His fans didn't know, his friends didn't know, his family didn't know, Dan didn't know... nobody knew. But one day, would people push him over his limit? Would Dan be able to save him in time? © 2016 by bluetroyee. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

psychedelia | phan by thenightlockfox

Dan has given up on ever being happy. Life has lost its meaning, and everything he seems to do causes some form of destruction, and Dan is so tired of destroying the things he used to love. He's lost so much, and he's scared of losing Phil, the only thing he can bring himself to care about. But Dan can't see past his own depression that Phil is struggling with bulimia, and that he's equally good at hiding his dark thoughts as Dan. And as Dan walks through the streets alone at night getting high to escape from the hell he's trapped himself in, will he be able to see that maybe the happiness he craves so desperately is not on the streets in the form of white pills, but inside his own apartment in the form of Phil Lester? Or will it be too late... WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE, SEXUAL SITUATIONS, USE OF DRUGS, VIOLENCE, HIGH LEVELS OF ANGST, BULIMIA, AND THEMES OF SUICIDE. IT IS NOT SUITABLE FOR YOUNGER READERS.

Midnight || Phan {Complete} by somesortofuser

Daniel Howell and Phil Lester have gone through a lot together. ***TRIGGER WARNING- SELF HARM / SUICIDE ATTEMPTS / DEPRESSION / HOMOSEXUALITY /SAD/ANGST***

He Speaks Suicide (Phan AU) by woe-is-Muke

TRIGGER WARNING: If self harm, blood, abuse, suicide, etc disturb you, then maybe this isn't the fic for you. I have plenty of others if you don't like the subject of this one. Do you ever just want to be a raindrop? Falling and falling until you hit the ground and that's when it all ends. **This fanfic will contain many mentions of lyrics to many bands in the chapters. just thought I'd give the heads up d( *u* )b **

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Slide 1 of 10

I love you cover

Life Is Precious, Just Like Him - Phil Lester X Depressed! Reader cover

I Am Nobody (phan) cover

im saved, finally [an "adopted by" phan ff] cover

struggling➾ phan (complete) cover

anathema ; phan cover

Depression//Phan cover

psychedelia | phan cover

Midnight || Phan {Complete} cover

He Speaks Suicide (Phan AU) cover

I love you

I love you so much. WARNING: SMUT