I've never believed in coincidences, but then again I don't believe that everything happens for a reason either. I guess I don't really know what I believe. I know that I don't believe in a god or any kind of deity. I just don't understand how anyone can, it is a ridiculous concept that can't be proven. Or maybe I hate the idea of entrusting my life, my destiny to someone or something I can't see, feel, hear, smell, or touch. Maybe that's just me. There are a few things I do know for sure, however. I know that my sister was murdered. I know that her case was closed and her killer is behind bars. I know that this should have given be closure. I also know that it didn't. Instead, I have this intense feeling of wanderlust that is pulling me to more than just physical places. Because of this, I'm lost. My therapist has told me more than once that I need to find closure, somehow, some way. I think it's a lost cause. I think for now, I'm lost and don't know that I'll ever get back.