Despair Journal

Despair Journal

Junko_That_Is_Me

Reads 830
Votes 109
Parts 13

MatureOngoing1h 7m

Last published Thu, Apr 5, 2018

despair fashion journal junko mẹ

despair despair despair despair despair despair despair despair despair despair despair despair basically how my life has been going??

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Dawn | Suicidal Todoroki x Bakugou
"I don't see a point in living. Living like this is just too tiresome... When will the shadow of yesterday disappear?" "Oi, I know it's beyond just draining to keep living, but there will never be a point to life until you find that point. Do you wanna die before you find it?" "I...don't know. Is it worth it to keep fighting through life just to find a reason to live?" [Completed 12/31/24.] 。。。| Note: - This fic is not intended to promote/encourage its darker/sensitive themes/topics. Disclaimer: - I do not own BNHA/MHA. All credit for the series and its characters goes to Horikoshi Kohei.
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𝙇𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙣 𝙏𝙤 𝙁𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙎𝙞𝙣𝙨
◇【 𝗬𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗩𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝗗𝗲𝗸𝘂 𝘅 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 】◇ 𝗕𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗧𝘄𝗼 《This is a sequel to the book, 'No Escape' 》 ' 𝙄'𝙈 𝙎𝙊𝙍𝙍𝙔 (𝙔/𝙉)! 𝙁𝙊𝙍𝙑𝙄𝙑𝙀 𝙈𝙀, 𝙋𝙇𝙀𝘼𝙎𝙀! 𝙍𝙀𝙑𝙀𝙍𝙎𝙀 𝙏𝙃𝙄𝙎! 𝙍𝙀𝙑𝙀𝙍𝙎𝙀 𝘼𝙇𝙇 𝙏𝙃𝙄𝙎! 𝙎𝘼𝙑𝙀 𝙈𝙀!' ─── · · · · That sentence had pierced through my entire being the day I was rescued...things were never the same since then. Things were slowly getting better but...it then slowly began to mold into unfortunate situations and events. But I should be safe...right? With the infamous Izuku Midoriya and his league now captured, you had nothing to worry about. No more horrors to live, no more fearing for you life and Eri's, no more suffering. Everything was going to be okay...right? 𝗪𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴 Every move felt like someone was observing you, any small thing would set your mind into a panic, every time you closed your eyes...nothing but all the dead bodies you have seen flashed through your mind. It wasn't your doing...you still have that connection you had so long ago. The telepathic bond that your kidnapper had made. No matter where you go you hear his voice faded in the back of your mind. It was maddening. But it all had to come to an end when the most devastating of news spread throughout Japan, making you feeling a heavy impact of emotions. This was your time to take action upon yourself, making a choice that no hero would do. But...thinking twice...can you learn to forgive the most deadliest of sins? ⚠️WARNING⚠️ The following story consists of violence, suicide attempts, self harm, display of mental illnesses, gore, and language. If you are not comfortable with these topics, I suggest you do not read this story.
Loaded Gun, Empty Arms
COMPLETED Todobaku fanfic Depressed Baku ######################### "N-No! Please!" I was being dragged down the hall to the scariest leader in history. "i haven't done anything wrong!" Tears streamed down my face and I was forced to my knees. I didn't dare look up, knowing my place in this world. "Here he is, Sir." There was no answer but I could feel all eyes on me. "Look at me." I slowly look up when told to and my blood runs as cold as the familiar eyes I lock onto. He had a tilted crown on his head and a gun in his hand. He sat on the throne like he was a king. And he is. ############################## The world has been taken over by a powerful Mafia group. Lead by a cold blooded killer. The world was his playground and no one could say otherwise. His face is unknown, only seen by his victims. Lately, people have gone missing. Males between the ages of 18 and 24. It was suspected the leader was looking for a bride, getting rid of potential suitors for young women. When Katsuki Bakugou was suddenly dragged from his home at age 19, he learned the real reason behind the disappearances. CONTAINS: -Sexual references -Mild mention of rape -Alcohol usage/ underage drinking -Self-harm/cutting -Depression -Death -Murder -Guns -Blood -Physical Abuse mentions and actions(not from todoroki) -Metal abuse mentions and actions -Bottom Bakugou -Mention of animal abuse (small) -Legal age gap STARTED: 5/5/2020 FINISHED: 5/29/2020 Also, for legal reasons, I don't own BNHA/MHA or any of the characters. Except Marshmallow.
Complete
Numb ---- Suicidal Todoroki x Bakugo----[BOOK 1]
"You know, you weren't supposed to see them." He dropped my arm. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?" He grabbed my other arm, exposing those cuts as well. Bloody bandages fell to the ground and his expression changed. "Is this supposed to make me feel better?!" He held both my arms in front of me. I could feel his hands shaking. I could hear his voice breaking. He was yelling, but I knew it was a facade. He wasn't angry. He was worried. He was sad. He just doesn't know how to express anything else. "It's fine. Don't worry. I'm okay." He dropped my arms and stepped back a bit, looking down for a few seconds. He yelled in frustration, pushing me to the ground suddenly. I avoided eye contact. "In what world?! What part of your fucked up mind is telling you that this is okay?! Because let me fucking tell you right now, if you ever fucking do this to yourself again I swear...." He punched the wall and yelled in frustration, taking a deep breath to calm himself. He paused for a few seconds before speaking again. "Get up." He held out his hand and I took it, standing up shakily. He grabbed my arms again, staring at them sadly. "Again? Why would you hide them again? Why this again?" He pled desperately. "You two." A different voice from across the hallway said, making us both jump a bit. Aizawa walked over to us, looking down at my cuts with slightly widened eyes, then back up at me with a concerned expression. "I need to talk to both of you."
Complete
Confessions From A True Fuck-Up
Basically I tell you about things that happen to me and my thoughts and u slowly realize im a terrible person
Complete
Feel ---- Suicidal Todoroki x Bakugo ---- [BOOK 2]
***READ 'NUMB' FIRST (ON MY PROFILE)*** Damn it Todoroki What the fuck did you do? Why the fuck did you do this to me? Why the fuck didn't you come back? You knew I never meant to hurt you I know You know that And yet You haven't come back It's been nearly a week I can't I can't handle this My intentions at the start were to help you And then part ways with you To focus on my career But I got attached And now I never want you to leave "I knew this would happen." I muttered angrily, grunting in pain as I kept punching. "I knew as soon as you got better." My eyes teared up a bit, but I convinced myself it was anger. "You wouldn't need me anymore." I said through grinding teeth. "And now you don't need me anymore." I hit it again, and a sharp, burning pain shot up my arm. I stumbled back and yelled in pain. I sat on the ground and stared at the floor, crying and grinding my teeth. You always hated when I'd push myself too much And even after everything No matter how hard I try I'm still a failure I always fail in the end I always fall short It's never enough Nothing I ever do Is enough to come out on top It used to be easy I was just naturally good Comfortable at the top And now I'm struggling just to stay in the running I stood up and walked to the locker room, slamming the door open and closed. I stood in front of the mirror with my hands on both sides of the sink, staring at my reflection. I was a mess. My eyes were red from my tears and my expression was exhausted and distressed. My face was tear-stained and I was light headed. Just completely out of it. I had bags under my eyes from stress filled days and sleepless nights, an obvious lack of rest. No wonder Aizawa confronted me I look like hell I feel like hell Fuck This is hell
Complete
Tell Me Why?
Damn my life have changed for the bad to the fucking worst in a matter of days i thought i had it all figure out but i guess not damn why me??......................
Complete
The Rich Emo: Ouran High School Host Club
Loneliness. Depression. Broken. Scared. Devastated. Hopeless. Mournful. Disheartening. Bleak. Joyless. Somber. I have no one. Depression and Loneliness are the only things I feel. My family tries to make me happy, but I just put on a fake smile and cry about it in my room. They act like everything is alright, but everything is not. They KNOW I was devastated about Mom's murder. They KNOW I was heartbroken about Dad's sickness that eventually killed him. That's all I've thought about. Devastation and heartbroken. Just because of those two things. Never in my life I have been this devastating. Dayton, Hayden, Angel, or Monica know how to make me truly happy. Not even my own siblings know how to make me show a real smile. Suicide is all I can think about day to day and I've almost died because of that. DEPRESSION IS A REAL THING. NO ONE KNOWS HOW I FEEL EVERYDAY. NO ONE CAN JUDGE OTHERS ABOUT DEPRESSION OR EVEN MAKE JOKES ABOUT IT BECAUSE ITS A REAL THING. DEPRESSION HAS KILLED PEOPLE. EVERYONE IN MY LIFE JUDGES ME JUST BECAUSE I DON'T SMILE, LAUGH, HUG, OR DO ANYTHING NORMAL PEOPLE DO. I CUT MYSELF, I CRY, I YELL, I VENT, I PUSH PEOPLE OUT OF MY LIFE. Those are the things people are worried about me. "Go kill yourself and join your parents in hell." They say and I just shrug it off and find a private place to hide and cry it out. "I CAN'T DEAL WITH LIFE ANYMORE!!!!" I say and I use my sharp nails and cut myself then cry some more. A gun is buried within my arm for defense from my dad, but I use it in case I am tired of society. Then that's when I met the Host Club. They saw my sadness and made me a part of it to repay my debt for accidentally breaking a vase. I am now a Host for men to flatter them, but how can normal guys want me to be a Host when I wear lip earrings, eyeliner, chains, and have a gun in my arm? I'm the definition of Hell. Then he made me smile again, something that I thought I would never get back. Happiness.
Complete
Bullet | Suicidal Todoroki x Midoriya
"I had everything... I had everything but the thing that, deep down, I wanted the most... I wanted to die." Not all wars are tangible. Shoto Todoroki might argue that his internal wars are far more excruciating than the traumatizing wars he fought in, but what if the loving support he receives and the damaging coping methods he utilizes aren't enough to save him from the true enemy of his own war? [Completed on 07/18/21.] Note: - **Special thanks to @kairichan13 for the absolute beauty of a cover!** - This story is not intended to encourage or promote its darker/sensitive themes/topics. - No Quirks AU. Disclaimer: - All credit for the BNHA/MHA characters used goes to Horikoshi Kohei.
Complete
Dear Diary
OK so this is going to be my attempt at an online diary. I will warn you though, there will be crude language, mindless rants, stupid things, and random things written throughout this. With bad grammar and spelling sometimes. Also, my life is very boring, and Im a very boring person. You have been warned.
Complete

Dawn | Suicidal Todoroki x Bakugou

"I don't see a point in living. Living like this is just too tiresome... When will the shadow of yesterday disappear?" "Oi, I know it's beyond just draining to keep living, but there will never be a point to life until you find that point. Do you wanna die before you find it?" "I...don't know. Is it worth it to keep fighting through life just to find a reason to live?" [Completed 12/31/24.] 。。。| Note: - This fic is not intended to promote/encourage its darker/sensitive themes/topics. Disclaimer: - I do not own BNHA/MHA. All credit for the series and its characters goes to Horikoshi Kohei.

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