Story cover for My  Written Thoughts by HelanaDrow3d
My Written Thoughts
  • WpView
    Reads 341
  • WpVote
    Votes 37
  • WpPart
    Parts 54
  • WpHistory
    Time 15m
  • WpView
    Reads 341
  • WpVote
    Votes 37
  • WpPart
    Parts 54
  • WpHistory
    Time 15m
Complete, First published Aug 30, 2016
Mature
This is just peotry being written. Just for fun and to let things go in a good way.....hope you enjoy
All Rights Reserved
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"Mom, not today. I don't even know why you're making me go. Today is dads..." I didn't want to finish and remind her of dads' birthday. My phone kept ringing, I already knew it was Dakota, he's my childhood best friend. "Just take your brother to school, please!" She exclaimed. She looked miserable. I shut the door and smelled the freshly cut grass. I smiled to myself knowing it was my dad's favorite smell. "Alexandria! We're gonna be late, can you stop daydreaming and get in the car." My brother, Cory hollered. He hates to think about dad. He just forgets. I Jeep Wrangler and I started the car, Cory rolled down his windows. "Are we sitting together at lunch today?" Cory asked me. "No I want you to sit with your friends, I'll be alright alone." I told him. "Alright Alex, believe it or not I actually love you. And I love you enough to tell you, you need friends." He admitted. "Have fun. Love you too, Corky." I laughed at the name I gave him when I was a kid. He smiled at me then left into the school. I went on to go to a flower shop. I stopped and got out. I walked in the shop. "Ally, do you have my order, the cars running?" I asked Ally. "Yeah Alex, I have it. Your order for 1 dozen Chocolate Cosmos, 2 dozen Daises, and 1 dozen yellow Roses." "Thanks Ally." I grabbed all the flowers then ran back to the car. I drove to the grave. I threw all my stuff into my bag. I grabbed the flowers and I pulled my bag over my shoulder and got out. I looked around and saw people young and old coming here to see their loved ones. I saw my families graves. Almost my whole family will be buried here. My grandpa always said it was sacred. I put the Cosmos on my dad's grave. The Daises on my grandmothers and the Roses on my grandpas. I talked and talked to them till I pull my pack of cigarettes out of my bag along with a lighter. I put the cancer stick in my mouth and lit it. "You guys are probably really mad right now. Blame peer pressure in 9th grade."
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I have a lot of secrets. Trying out for my new school's football team disguised as a boy is only the beginning. As much as I hate to admit it, I'm developing a disturbing crush on a teammate. But that's not my worst secret. Nobody here knows I have a twin brother named Pax. Or that he died last year. And that I might be delusional because I see him and hear him, everywhere. Or maybe it's the guilt that haunts me. Because I know deep down that my father is the one who killed him. And keeping that secret somehow makes me complicit. But my biggest secret of all is that I'm afraid that I'll never be able to forgive my dad for Pax's death. Until I can put that ghost to rest, my brother's spirit will be forever lost in the liminal space between this world and the next. And I am lost in this world without him.