Story cover for Why? by CanadianMendesGirl
Why?
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Ongoing, First published Sep 01, 2016
Why? Why is the title "Why"? Why does life get harder as i live? I try to live my day as harmless as possible, as joyful as possible. Athough, I can never get through those days. I want to be happy, but I can't without hurting anyone. However, I want everyone to be happy, but  I can't without hurting me. Why? I try to forgive people who have sinned to me, I try to say "ye I forgive you", when I truly don't. I know i can't keep everyone happy and I obviously can't make everyone happy, although of course I try to. But i know I'm not God, I can't do those things. I just don't understand anymore, how I can't make a decision or a choice for something that makes me happy without hurting someone else. I've given up but, why am I still fighting?
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All you need Is love but sometimes love alone isn't enough  by RENOl_ENOLA
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I really don't remember the last time I was happy even my childhood memories I honestly don't remember having a bubbly childhood like any other kids ,my life has always been miserable and honestly learned how to adapt to that. you honestly smile over something stupid , laugh over a cracked joke for a few minutes and there's that thing that triggers that you just had enough and you should stop and your mood just goes down and there's nothing to do about it. It's like the inner you always wakes up fucked up more than you are fucked up and tells you that you just sad and you gonna stay that way until you take out the anger on something or someone but you know what something always has to be the blade, permanent scars on how bad it was ,a daily reminder on how life is and how sadness over comes you at times actually not at times but everytime and on the someone part , you hurt people that honestly try to reach out to you and show you how much they care about you but you just had it with everyone and everything and you want no one caring about your feelings and giving a fuck about you because you can't reciprocate the feelings. You can't find yourself caring about anyone else but you but still can't care about yourself enough to feel safe or protected , he was the only one that made me feel alive and I lost him but what hurts more is losing someone and only realizing later what they meant to you.
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THIS IS NOT A STORY It is a point of vew of people and life the things i feel that maybe others can relate no sugar coated fantasies...If you can't handel some of it i understand just be respectfull in the comments please ;) ⚠️TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ ⚠️MATURE LANGUAGE⚠️ - it does have some intense emotions and topics within this story your discretion is advised