How I Fixed My Pathetic Self - MansonDope626 - Wattpad

Story cover for How I Fixed My Pathetic Self by MansonDope626

How I Fixed My Pathetic Self

Reads 72
Votes 2
Parts 6
Time 27m

Reads 72
Votes 2
Parts 6
Time 27m

army complete dangerous dolphins drugs ecstacy expirience finished high hoplessromantic love nonfandom nonfiction pathetic reallife reallifeexperience realstory recoveringfromabuse

I figured out how to fix myself! No more hard drugs! I need to build myself to do things on my own without... "outside forces"
I had no idea my adventure would end like this. I did little story of my experience with ONLY ecstasy for the first time. While describing what I experienced from JUST ONE ecstasy. I also mention what I was thinking about as the effects surfaced. This all lead to an answer I've been looking for... for a very very long time. 
BYE BYE heavily intoxicated me. 

This is the first time I've actually paid attention to the effects of a drug other than marijuana and I decided to take record of  it AS it happened... and I just want to share my experience. 
In this there was no "let me go change that, that's weird." or "I don't want to share that..."
everything was put on the table as it happened with the time recorded and everything.

p.s. Feel free to jump around, I tend to babble a bit in my writing sometimes.All Rights Reserved

army complete dangerous dolphins drugs ecstacy expirience finished high hoplessromantic love nonfandom nonfiction pathetic reallife reallifeexperience realstory recoveringfromabuse

Table of contents

6 parts

Sign up to add How I Fixed My Pathetic Self to your library and receive updates

or

#742hoplessromantic

Content Guidelines

You may also like

NAVEL GAZING: excessive absorption in self-analysis or focus on a single issue by ANMS111

-A Lie I decided to focus on family, choosing to believe-and have faith-that everything else would fall into place. I wasn't comfortable-or good-at lying to her. So, when Samantha surprised me one day by swallowing her pride and asking directly if anything had happened during our break, I hesitated. The silence, I believed, said it all. I was on the verge of confessing when she gave me an out: "If you tell me nothing happened, I'll believe you," she said. I should have told her the truth then-or resolved never to reveal it. But I didn't. Instead, it surfaced years later, during the final unraveling of our marriage, when I was leaving for good. I selfishly brought it up, hoping it would push her away. But in that earlier moment, I let her believe what she clearly wanted to hold on to-that I had been faithful. She knew Pippa, and probably sensed something had happened between us, but she let it go. And so did I. It was cowardice, I know. Still, I made up my mind to make our dream a reality. And for a while, it worked. We rebuilt, we dreamed again. Three more sons came into our lives, and with them, years of trying to hold it all together. But more than a dozen years later, the same problems that once threatened us had only deepened-and would soon spiral out of control.

Someone New by wambuimuiruriii

"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboard

Evolution by andshesmiles

There are a lot of things you don't really think about until they happen to you. Take rape, for instance. I always thought, "That won't happen to me. I have a boyfriend. I trust him. He would never take advantage of me like that..." I couldn't have been more wrong. Love in this day and age is often confused for manipulation and abuse. The warning signs are here. The things we say will tell us everything that is wrong. You are worth more than what you think you are. It's not your fault. If they tell you otherwise, get out. Burn the bridge. Always remember someone is waiting for you to walk into their life. Someone needs you. Someone loves you. Getting away from all of the wrong people and finding the right ones could save you. I can promise you right now that it saved me. These are the journal entries and selected poems from my first experience of love that left a unpleasant taste in my mouth- quite literally. I am putting this out for the whole world to see because I hope everyone will learn from my experience. People can see. We have no excuses to continue living our lives in ignorance. ...WARNING... HARMFUL THEMES INCLUDING MENTION OF SUICIDE, SELF HARM, AND RAPE. THIS HAS EXPLICIT CONTENT. RECOVERY AND AWARENESS IS THE PURPOSE OF SHARING. DO NOT READ IF THESE THEMES ARE OFFENSIVE OR HARMFUL TO YOU.

Atlantis Academy: The First Element by AutumnKalquist

Five Star Reviews for Atlantis Academy: "Omg this book was amazing I couldn't put it down or stop reading. I carried it with me open on my phone while I did everything just to keep reading. I need more of all of this. Epic story, epic content, epic visuals, just epic. LOVE THIS!" "Once I got into this story, I did not stop reading it. This is a beautiful story about a very awkward girl who is riven with so much pain and angst and yet... this makes her who she is and shapes her into the person she will become. The world she finds herself awakened to is magical and yet filled with the all-too-familiar cliques and tribes of the very human people who inhabit it. One word to describe the story: beautiful!" "The story pulls you headlong to the end and leaves you wanting to shout "No! Not yet!" ...If there were 6 stars, I would have given it that." *** Humanity is one secret society away from extinction. The children of Atlantis use magic to keep us safe. If they make it through the Academy. Hi, I'm Lyric. And I'm kind of a mess. ADHD, that's me. I'm a high school drop-out, late everywhere I go, and one screw-up away from being homeless. I'm a loner, and I like it that way. Who needs friends when you have a Redwood forest nearby? Trees never bully me like the kids did at school. Or get drunk and throw things at my head. After my mom died, I figured life couldn't get much worse. I thought it might even get better. Ha. The universe has a great sense of humor. I should've listened to the rumors about evil spirits. About the angry, ancient magical creatures haunting our small Oregon Coast town. But did I? No. That was my first mistake. And it might be my last. 'Cause now I'm in a battle for my life. A whole new world has opened up... a magical world I don't understand. And the blood in my veins says I belong here. But I have to prove myself to save myself. And when have I ever done that?

Behind every mean girl...there's a tragedy by Winchesters_united

The average human being spends every second of his day fighting against the force of nature to see another day. But I'm different. I'm not afraid of outside forces to take my life away - only myself. Approximately 10 years ago, something happened to me. Something really bad. But I'm not allowed to talk about it. As a way to release my frustration, I give hell to my body and everyone I come in contact with - especially my parents. No one knows about what happened except the ones who did it...and Him. But he didn't stay. Now, he's back and he's not talking either. I want to stop hurting, I need to stop. Make me stop.

The Backpacker's Dream by CanisMajoris5

'No, he didn't'. I was so shocked by the turn of events. Everything was going fine and then suddenly boom, everything turned upside down. I just couldn't believe this. What did he think of himself? 'Leave me alone.' I said firmly but his hold on me was so strong. I was struggling to get out of his bear hold but to no avail. 'Oh!! So, the poor lady thinks that I will leave her alone and just let her go free?' He had that evil laugh and boy, his breath stank. 'Man, you just signed your death warrant and I will do one favour on you.' No one messes with me. 'Ooooh, I am so scared that I almost peed my pants.' Again that idiotic laugh. I counted till 5 and then kicked right in his balls. I turned around and grabbed his hair from roots, jerked them so badly and then gave my hard elbow shot on his chin. Everything happened so fast for one moment he was standing and the other lying on floor wiggling. I charged at him with my cheetah speed, picked up a wooden rod and started hitting him wildly, 'You idiotic stinky breath was trying to steal my backpack. You are so dead.' 'Favour, favour, favour.' He was screaming in pain just after few seconds and was panting hard. I picked my paste from my bag and threw at him, 'Brush your teeth.' I was fuming. I turned around and saw him standing wide-eyed, 'Hi, I am Scarlett.' I smiled showing my 32 teeth. 'I am scared.' His look puzzled me. Starting date- November 5, 2019 Completed on - May 23, 2020 All Rights Reserved.

FINDING MY KING - P1 SCREENPLAY by Dcoleman80

SCREENPLAY VERSION.... 18+ readers only ❤️ I've lived the last eight years of my life in pain. Pain that should've brought me to my knees, with a big fat "Screw-you world, I'm outta here!" Still, I refused to give up. Never did I want to be that weak, pitiful woman I was with him. Our relationship, (If you can even call it that) became toxic. I knew it was, but I didn't see this one coming. No, that's a lie. It was totally his style. It didn't surprise me at all. I lost so much confidence because of him, so finding love was a complete no no. I just couldn't allow anybody else in after living with the devil himself. It's impossible. I've lost the ability to trust anybody, aside from my family and my best friend. But never did I imagine my life going this way, and because of it, I lost all hope of ever finding love again. Living with all that destruction almost destroyed me. I knew he was bad, but never did I think he would ruin my life. He knew how important my dreams were, and still, he destroyed everything. Crazily, I knew it was his jealousy that made him do it. I've never in my life met anybody so green-eyed before. It was all about control, and I had enough. Since then, it's taken a long time in getting my life back on track. Yet just when I thought it was clear to move forward, I'm hit with more drama. Can I survive it, or will the devil himself come back and destroy my happiness forever?

If I Try (Lesbian Story) by Balueyes

My life in ruins, this is where I'm at currently. I was living a lie, lying to people and most importantly to myself. You can act straight all you want, you can try to convince yourself that, but no matter how hard you try. The truth is always revealed. What did I do? I stroked her face, and told her she was still beautiful, then I bent down and kissed her. One of those soft, yet deep, gut wrenching, I'll always love you, but I have to let you go, goodbye kisses. Then I rested my forehead on hers and closed my eyes. I saw the past that we had, all of the memories we had together, I took them in, I felt the feelings again, I processed them. Then I saw the dreams that we dreamed for our future, I saw all of our plans that we made, I felt them, I felt the pain of what would never be, and then I released it all. I didn't realize I was sobbing until I felt her hand graze over the tears. I opened my eyes, blinked away the tears I had left, and smiled. She returned my smile. We knew at that point that no matter what happened, we would be ok.............. This is my struggle, this is my journey. Join me for the ride, but make sure you wear your helmet.

Whispers of Survival (NOW ON AMAZON) by JeniRaeD

Previously named: Hot Summer Night (COMPLETELY EDITED and RENAMED) Seraphine escaped a nightmare, but Chadwick's vengeance stalks her every step, his sadistic games threatening to shatter her fragile freedom. Declan, the ex-lover she thought lost forever, is her shield, vowing to protect her and his daughter Everly from the monster's grasp. Together, they hide in a small Alabama town, their rekindled love a beacon against the darkness. But Chadwick's closer than they think, his chilling messages and deadly traps tightening the noose. As fear tests their trust, Seraphine and Declan must face their pasts-her trauma, his guilt-to save Everly and themselves. One wrong move, and they'll lose everything. Will their love survive the fight, or will Chadwick's evil claim them all? A heart-stopping thriller of love, survival, and family, where every choice could be their last.

You may also like

Slide 1 of 9

NAVEL GAZING: excessive absorption in self-analysis or focus on a single issue cover

Someone New cover

Evolution cover

Atlantis Academy: The First Element cover

Behind every mean girl...there's a tragedy cover

The Backpacker's Dream cover

FINDING MY KING - P1 SCREENPLAY cover

If I Try (Lesbian Story) cover

Whispers of Survival (NOW ON AMAZON) cover

NAVEL GAZING: excessive absorption in self-analysis or focus on a single issue

-A Lie I decided to focus on family, choosing to believe-and have faith-that everything else would fall into place. I wasn't comfortable-or good-at lying to her. So, when Samantha surprised me one day by swallowing her pride and asking directly if anything had happened during our break, I hesitated. The silence, I believed, said it all. I was on the verge of confessing when she gave me an out: "If you tell me nothing happened, I'll believe you," she said. I should have told her the truth then-or resolved never to reveal it. But I didn't. Instead, it surfaced years later, during the final unraveling of our marriage, when I was leaving for good. I selfishly brought it up, hoping it would push her away. But in that earlier moment, I let her believe what she clearly wanted to hold on to-that I had been faithful. She knew Pippa, and probably sensed something had happened between us, but she let it go. And so did I. It was cowardice, I know. Still, I made up my mind to make our dream a reality. And for a while, it worked. We rebuilt, we dreamed again. Three more sons came into our lives, and with them, years of trying to hold it all together. But more than a dozen years later, the same problems that once threatened us had only deepened-and would soon spiral out of control.