He's not that funny - Talia - Wattpad

He's not that funny

Reads 271,796
Votes 6,157
Parts 46
Time 6h 30m

Reads 271,796
Votes 6,157
Parts 46
Time 6h 30m

Mature

abuse batman comics daddy dc drug fanfic fanfiction imagine jaredleto joker kink love mature suicidesquad thejoker thriller violence xreader

Mona stopped chugging and nudged me ''Uh excuse me babe... but you do realise you have just caught the attention of Mistah J'' she said looking a little frightened. ''Who?'' I replied. She gave me a death glare ''Who?! bloody who? The Joker, the guy who owns this very club, who owns Gotham city, the guy who probably owns every single girls vagina in this joint!'' she said out of breath. ''Im not too sure about the last one'' a strange voice said.  We turnt around startled to find him behind us. ''I don't own you'' he said pointing at Mona ''And I definitely don't own you... yet''  he growled tilting his head to the side, giving me a sinister smile which showed off all of his metal plated teeth. 

I looked at Mona, she looked at me. ''Well shit then, who fancies another drink!?'' she said finally taking a breath.


RANKED NO.1 IN JOKER 


COPYRIGHTS TO DC COMICS FOR ANY CHARACTER THEY OWN.All Rights Reserved

abuse batman comics daddy dc drug fanfic fanfiction imagine jaredleto joker kink love mature suicidesquad thejoker thriller violence xreader

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❝Dangerous❞ » The Joker (ALL CHAPTERS NEWLY UPDATED) by badwhcre

Just two criminals getting involved with each other. A business scheme for the famous Joker soon turned into something he couldn't seem to escape from. His choice was to kill you and take advantage of you but now he is slowly starting to question and reconsider his plans. 18+ Joker x Fem!Reader! • Jared Leto/Suicide Squad/Gangster Joker •

Beastly | ✓ by pieceofcupcake

"Get ready to scream Ms. Quinn." The words rolled out of his tongue as his soft lips grazed my neck. "You can't make me scream." I said firmly, trying to control my hand from touching him. He growled, his hand tightening around me, sending tingles all over my body. "I can make you scream without even touching you." He whispered huskily, pulling me closer to his body and I bit my lip. What the hell is he doing to me? Cover by: @-averagesky

The King and Queen Of Crime { Joker x Reader } by RndWriterT

[ Joker x Reader ] You were a normal girl, that was until The Joker came along. He made you insane, you were the King and Queen. But things got complicated... you needed to disappear it wasn't until later you watched the news and saw him... With some chick who goes by the name of: Harley Quinn. ~ Will You and Joker Become The King and Queen Again? ~ { Or } ~ Will You Stay The Lone Wolf You Are? ~ WARNINGS: EXPLICIT CONTENT SEXUAL THEMES VIOLENCE STRONG LANGUAGE! P.S: I really hope to make this a long book, comment if you enjoy, I really want to know you guys are there!

The New Me by SotoFish

What will happen when an innocent, vulnerable girl meets a madman who have similar opinions on life? Will she try and run, or will he help her release her true self? "You know, sometimes, life can suck." He softly spoke, placing a hand on my shoulder. "Yeah, it can." He lifted my chin, meeting my eyes. "But that doesn't mean, you can't make it the way you want. And do anything you desire." A smile spread across my face, as he handed me the metal weapon. "No one can tell you otherwise, as long as your having fun." He smiled. "This isn't a game... It's your life. Choose what you do with it. You can make it a dream, or follow the rules, like all these other boring people do." *** She held the gun against his head as she smiled. "Hello there," She whispered, placing herself on his lap. The guy stared at her terrified, which made her happy. She fed on his fear. Taking the gun away, she placed it against her temple, smirked, and eventually laughed. "Please...don't hurt me." He begged. She didn't answer. All she did was stare at him like the piece of meat he was. He began to cry, and yell for help. "Yelp! Someone help us! Help me!" She yelled with him only to break out laughing. "No one's coming," She informed. "Get off me freak! This is a big mistake! You're gonna pay for this!" He yelled. She placed the gun back to his forehead, and shook her head, "Say hi to Daddy for me." *** I do not own any Marvel Or DC comics characters. However, i do own Delilah. :D Book one of the Damaged Series

What A Clown... by RiscViolante

I am Victory C, Im a Drug GodFather. Ive done deals with Gotham before. With Bruce Wayne, Black Mask, Penguin and many more. I am wanted in over 3 countries as 'a dangerous MAN in his 40's' Im Not that. Im 27 and A Very Very Dangerous Woman...well nobody knows that...they think Im The one that inspired the devil, a madman that should be tamed someone everyone should fear...Mr. V. And Thats Just The Way I like it. ---- My First joker fanfic...Please enjoy and please comment... Warning-This story MAY contain graphic violence. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!

Henchman (JOKER X READER) ✅ by HALOMAVERICK

You got fired from your job, assisted a bank robbery, and met the Joker all on the same day. Can you survive working for the Joker? Will having his trust be more dangerous than not? And, despite everything, can you stop yourself from falling in love with him? "Do you trust me, Y/N?" "Do I have a choice?" "No. Hold still." 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐃: 12/3/21 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐃: 11/2/22 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐊𝐒: #1 in #joker #1 in #jokerxreader #1 in #harleyquinn #1 in #gotham #1 in #suicidesquad #1 in #dccomics #1 in #readerxcharacter (twice) #3 in #fanfiction #4 in #batman Jokerxreader [ALSO ON AO3]

Jester: Joker's Daughter by Davidsmate24

Hello everyone, This is my first story, I hope you enjoy it. Left abandoned by the birth parents, a newborn baby is left on the streets of Gotham all alone, but that all changes, when the King of Gotham "adopts" the baby and takes the newborn under his wing. Will Joker be able to take of care of a baby and train it to be his new partner in crime or will the baby change his heart and turn him into the Daddy, the baby needs. IMPORTANT: There will be a small part(s) in the story where it deals with abuse. If you don't want to read the part(s), you don't have to, but please do not report this story, if read this message. I own the right to my character Jess/Jessie/ Jester and the story line. I don't own any Suicide Squad characters or Batman characters, they all belong to the DC Universe.

Careful... (The Joker x Male Reader) by cancelledx

(Y/N) was always looking for adventure. He couldn't ever turn down an opportunity for it. There was no acception when he met Gotham's prettiest psycho. What will happen if he's not careful?

Beautiful Chaos by BlackBull4LIFE

A lonely young women's life changes the very night of Murray Franklin's murder, on live television and it is a change that her heart will never forget. When she spots a man passed out and bloody, in an alley, that same night and even when she sees who it is, even though she hesitates for a moment, that doesn't stop her from trying to help him, despite him resisting it. Even though her mind wills against it, her fragile heart finds a lifeline in his. She soon comes to realize that this man is so much more than this "Joker" person that's all over the news, but a kind and beautiful soul that has suffered greatly, as has hers. She comes to find that he has a brilliant light that glows brightly inside of her very own darkness as the moon gleams in the night's sky, for even the moon would not shine so brightly, without the darkness that surrounds it. 🌙 A/N: I just want to say first, that this fic will never be abandoned! I promise. It's already done anyway but needs editing. I update every 7 to 10 days ♡

Madhouse by allif21

When (y/n) meets Gotham's most notorious criminal her life is changed forever. Living in the fast life, she must face insanity, death and her worst fears. Will she make it out alive? ©Allif21 •Joker X Reader• •Minor smut• {Most characters in book do not belong to me} • #1 in #SuicideSquad • Started: August 21st, 2016? (I think?)

Jokes On You, Batsy! Joker's and Harley's Daughter: Jester, (Y/n) by AshleyGryffindor

Gotham City at night was a cesspool of crime, drugs, murder and all-around bad guys. The Joker and Harley Quinn are two of the quote and unquote bad guys by the GCPD and Batsy!....But to me, they are my dear old Daddy and Momma! Call him psychotic and cruel if ya want, but to me and my mom, he's sweet as coconut cream bomb pie! My crazy momma and daddy were locked up by Batsy when I was ten years old. The stupid good guys didn't think the Clown King and Queen of Gotham had a little Clown Princess named Y/n Quinn or on the streets of Gotham with Aunt Poison Ivy: Jester. On and off again, my parents broke out of jail and returned home til I left home and my mom was sent to Belle Reve. I made a name for myself in the dark underground of Gotham at the age of eighteen making my parents proud of their psychotic little girl, all the scum and villains knew who I was then one day lead to me being caught by Batsy and his little bat family then shipped off to Arkham Asylum Prison where I'd find him! My own Harlequin! HAHAHAHA!! E/c - Eye Color H/c/s - Hair color streaks Guns - Favorite Weapon Male Harlequin (Not your momma!) and Jester (Y/n) Respect and Appreciation to the artists of the artworks I use in this book, which I find in Pinterest Ranked: NUMBER 1 IN batmanuniverise back at 2021!!! Made in October 3th 2019 Republished on November 1st, 2023

MAD • Joker x Harley Quinn (Book 1) ✓ by frannfrann7

"I know you, I own you, you're mine!" The madness of how their love is. Obsession, confusion, possession, power, and affection. The full walkthrough of their life as dangerous psychopaths of the whole Gotham City, the rulers of Arkham and Gotham. The King and the Queen. -The Joker & Harley Quinn Fanfiction -10.17.19/7.22.20 #1 in jarley - 11/1/19 #2 in harleyquinn - 07/01/20

✓ ♕Poison♕ [Joker x Reader] by DowneysDuck

*COMPLETED "Don't ever worry about me. " He whispered in my ear, then gave me a passionate kiss. J's hand moved to my face, and cupped my cheek. I grabbed his back and pulled his body down onto mine. He went down from my lips and placed kisses on my neck and collarbone, occasionally biting my skin. -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_- Y/N- Your name Y/H/C- Your hair color Y/E/C- Your eye color When kidnapped by the clown prince himself (Jared Leto), Y/N's life is changed forever. Joker wanted Y/N as his new sidekick to terrorize Gotham, but he got more than what he bargained for. **COMPLETED SEQUEL: LOST AND FOUND *RATED R: STRONG SEXUAL AND VIOLENCE RANKINGS: #7 in SUICIDESQUAD [7/24/18] #10 in JOKER [8/5/18] #4 in JOKER [8/23/18] #2 in JOKER [8/31/18] © DowneysDuck, 2016 Enjoy. :)

sightless. by auroraaus

[Completed] The Villainless Series Book 1. Joker Romance. The Joker had the ultimate joke fall into his lap. How absolutely hysterical would it be to make someone so innocent fall in love with the Joker himself? Hysterical, right? He wasn't ready for how he felt after the delivery of the punchline. Amy was temporarily blinded, and as per doctor's orders, she couldn't be alone until her sight came back. She didn't understand who this man was taking care of her, but he smelled good. From the silky sheets she could feel beneath her, she knew he was rich. He told her he was single, but that gravelly voice could make any woman's panties melt. Why was he taking the time to care for her? There had to be something wrong with him. Will it be a complete deal breaker when she finally figures out just how much is wrong with him? JokerxOC Romance FanFiction *Caution: This story contains sexual content.*

Will You Be My Daddy? ~Joker Fanfiction~ by Gingy484

What would happen if the Joker turned a four year old girl into a loyal and merciless killer? Joker meets a little girl on the street and she asks if he will be her daddy. He quickly dreams up a scheme to cause chaos with the little ragamuffin. However, despite his attempts to make the girl the perfect murderer, she is too sweet and giggly to focus on anything he tells her and ends up sidetracking him and making him laugh. He finds that he is using the plot as an excuse to have the girl around. But what happens when his girl is threatened by other villains? Will he defend her? Or what if she fails in his evil plot? How will Batman react to Joker's plan? *****TW: Attempted sexual assault of a minor in chapter 1-does not get very far but description can be jarring, so stay safe******* This story is rated PG-13, at least by me, for cursing, violence, and other mature themes and ideas. Obviously no good Joker fanfiction is going to be rated G. Read at your own risk, and don't try to report this book if you don't take this warning seriously. Know yourself and your limits. For real, if it's not appropriate for you, just don't read it, don't send hate. By the way, according Wattpad guidelines, stories are considered mature if: scenes of sex, graphic violence, or self-harm are depicted or if the media contains nudity or other inappropriate content. So cursing does not necessarily a mature story make. I own the right to my character Madeline and the plot associated with her story. I do not own any of the characters that belong to the DC Comics universe. This fanfiction will use the Jared Leto Joker as the primary source of physical inspiration, but Heath Ledger's Joker is the ideological muse here, as well as quotes and themes from other Jokers, perhaps even Gotham's Jerome Valeska. -Started June 2017- -Completed November 2018-

⬙What A Mess⬙ (Joker X Reader X Batman) by MO0NTEARS

⚠️ COMPLETED ⚠️ Created By: Maddest-0f-them-all 6/28/18 ❗️ Just a heads up, Book 1(this Book) is more focused on the joker! Skip to chapter 3 if your desperate for the joker!!! ❗️ What happens when you die? Well, you died and here's a summary of what happened>>> You woke up in another body and You ended up in another world where superhero's and villains existed. Two men, who're your main focus point, develop feelings for you. Intense feelings for you. They are The Notorious Joker and Batman himself. What will you do when things get bloody? • What A Mess • ___________________________________________ If you really only wanna read this book for the joker than skip to chapter 3, :P ___________________________________________ (c) 2018 by Maddest-0f-Them-All, all rights reserved

Joker Imagines by ang3l_inlove

You will notice a sudden change in the writing I would like to credit those to @mammikk and @gothamcityssiren I always take requests. Smut takes longer than any other writings (I have to contain myself from laughing while writing (ik weird) smut) I don't own any of the dc characters, or any of the gifs featured in this book. Tw: Mentions of blood, drug abuse, drugs, death, etc Enjoy.

Gotham's Little Princess (A Harley Quinn & Jared Leto Joker fanfic) by CamiSweetness

"My Harley always wanted children, a baby girl to be precise. It was quite annoying..that little fantasy she had built in that crazy head of hers that we would become a faaammily." The uncomfortableness in the air begin the choke my emotions. "She had a list of names she'd had written down in a little journal. Sometimes she'd share them with me like I cared to hear. There's one in particular that caught my attention one night," he leaned in closer to me letting a light chuckle escape his lips. "Secret is, I lovvved it and deep down she knew I did." Lucy Jae Quinzel had questions but wasn't getting the answers she longed for. One bad day.....that one bad day unlocked a secret that would change her life forever. ⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ This book is about "THE JOKER" & also "HARLEY QUINN" expect, foul language, dark themes such as suicidal thoughts & attempts, murder, violence, abuse, sexual assault, detailed blood & gore scenes & anything my dark mind will come up with. I WILL NOT put trigger warnings at the beginning of each chapter. To me, it ruins the chapter. So please, if you think your running into a dark scene your uncomfortable with, skip over as much as possible. Other then that enjoy lovelies 😘 Also, I don't own any rights to DC comics characters. I also don't own any of the pictures of the characters I make up as I go further into the book. I'm using The Joker & Harley Quinn from Suicide Squad. I'm just switching up the placement of their story a bit (the birth of their daughter)

Property Of Joker | ✓ by pieceofcupcake

❝Some people bring out the best in you, others brings out the worst, then there are those remarkably rare, addictive ones who bring out the most. Of everything. They make you feel so alive that'd follow them straight into hell, just to keep getting your fix.❞ Meet Harleen Quinzel; A shy psychiatrist who starts her career in the infamous Arkham Asylum. Her first assignment? Joker. What will happen when she gets mesmerised by how he sees the world differently? What will happen when she realises that she is changing and having more fun in her life after meeting him? He challenges and tests her limits, bringing the real her out of her shell. Can she cope up? Add a little spoon of heart breaks, a jar of fun, a cup of love, a tea-spoon of thrill. And, finally top it with a whole lot of craziness. What do we get? Warning: This fanfiction will make you fall more madly in love with Mr. J, that you might go absolutely bat-shit crazy. You have been warned. Cover by: @-averagesky

Property Of Mistah J | ✓ by pieceofcupcake

❝If you have never lost your sanity, then you have never been in love.❞ Meet Harley Quinn; She is not the Harleen she was anymore. She has changed for the better. Joker has finally accepted her and life is perfect for once. Maybe ...not. Will she be able to handle this brand new lifestyle that she had always wanted? Add a dash of spice, a cup of jokes, a jar of craziness, spray a little mad love and finally top it with a cherry of fun. What do we get? Warning: This fanfiction will make you even more crazier in love with Joker than you already are. You have been warned. Cover by: @-averagesky

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Just two criminals getting involved with each other. A business scheme for the famous Joker soon turned into something he couldn't seem to escape from. His choice was to kill you and take advantage of you but now he is slowly starting to question and reconsider his plans. 18+ Joker x Fem!Reader! • Jared Leto/Suicide Squad/Gangster Joker •