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Fix Me [1]
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- Parts 2
Ongoing11m
Last published Fri, Oct 21, 2016
She looked at me, pausing for a moment before speaking.
"When you're dying on the inside, nobody notices it. A smile can hid the fact that, you're dying and you need help. But you can't say it, until he notice you were dying, and your world just changed. So, why can't you love him?" I thought over the question, she had a point. Why couldn't I love him? My heart wanted, my body wanted him, and I needed him so badly. But, why couldn't I love him?
"I dunno why I can't love him. I should, because he loves me, but somehow I can't love. My heart is broken." I say quietly, she barely heard it. She nodded slowly, before scribbling something in that stupid notebook. It was quiet, very quiet. I wasn't feeling like myself; I felt uneasy. And dizzy.
"How are you feeling, Ryder?" She asked and how did I feel? I don't know. Some reason, I was sweating in my leather jacket, and my heart is pounding for some reason. I felt really hot, I couldn't understand what was happening. But when I didn't answer she knew something was wrong.
"What's wrong?" I didn't answer. My knuckles gripped the chair, my breathing picked up, and I suddenly felt pain spread through out my body like wild fire and I hunched over. Moaning in pain, I ignore her asking me what was wrong and I growl. I lifted my head slowly, and looked straight into her eyes.
"Jasper."
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Even from far away, all I could see was you. "Who is who?" Derek asked, unfazed, sipping on the remainder of his protein shake from class. "Her." I didn't point to you, to avoid being too obvious, so I nodded my head in the most subtle way. "Laughing, smiling. Do you see her?" "The girl with the guy hanging off of her who's clearly her boyfriend? I think he plays on the varsity team. She's probably a cheerleader." I pretty much ignored everything he said. I didn't care. I was already too far gone and into you. "I have to have her." He must have found that incredibly hilarious because he almost choked on the remainder of his protein shake. "Good luck, kid." "What?" I took my eyes off of you for a second and gave Derek a look. "You can't picture it?" "How blinded by her are you right now?" He waved his hand in front of my face and I pushed it away as he attempted to connect the dots for me again. "I repeat: cheerleader, guy, out of your fucking league." "Hey, let's not make assumptions now. She could be into girls and not even know it. Oh my god, she just smiled at me. Did you see that? Were you looking?" I was in love with you the second you walked into my sight. "There's a lot going on in this vicinity," he laughed and I shoved him as he taunted me. "Jerk. I'm gonna talk to her."
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