My Father Always Told Me...

From generation to generation, little boys and girls have come to sit on their fathers' laps and ask for worldly advice. To this pleading appeal, the father will reply, "Well, son (or daughter), my father always told me...", to be followed with a pithy saying, bestowing wisdom upon the child. This is a collection of my own father's attempts to fill my sister, brother, and me with his abounding knowledge of the universe.